Remember When I Asked Who Dallas Braden Was? He Pitched a Perfect Game Yesterday. Whoops

OAKLAND, Calif. -- Dallas Braden definitely owns the mound now. Braden pitched the 19th perfect game in major league history on Sunday, shutting down the majors' hottest team and leading the Oakland Athletics to a 4-0 victory over the Tampa Bay Rays.  Braden threw his arms in the air after Gabe Kapler grounded out to shortstop for the final out, his simmering feud with Yankees star Alex Rodriguez merely a footnote to the first perfect game for Oakland in 42 years.

Congrats, bro. You won a perfect game in May. It's a huge win but it's still just a win. Your win/loss record still only goes up by 1. You don't get a pay raise or a world series ring or anything worth talking about 5 years from now. I can't even name the last guy to pitch a perfect game but I can tell you how MTV came out with Engaged and Underage which then evolved into 16 and pregnant and then Teen Mom. Really went the other way on that one. I'm pretty fucking terrified of what comes next.