This Seems a Bit Illegal

Taylor Swift is serious about her romance with Jake Gyllenhaal -- the country sweetheart bonded with his actress sister Maggie and her daughter, Ramona, while staying with her family in New York over the Thanksgiving holiday. The singer was first linked to the "Brokeback Mountain" hunk in October, although they have yet to confirm the relationship and have both dodged questions about their love lives during various interviews. But their secret is no more -- paparazzi snaps of the new couple cuddling and laughing during a stroll in Brooklyn last week have been splashed across the cover and inside pages of Us Weekly magazine.

Uhhh bringing the bitch to Thanksgiving dinner is serious. It's like bringing grandma to Applebees.  I'm not talking about a little visit after dinner for a beer night cap with football. I mean spending the whole day with the fam and chowing down on the greatest american holiday known to man. I've never been a fan of Taylor Swift. Her music is ehh but her face is eww. And her body. What body? She reminds me of a fucking flag pole. I have no funny back story for that one, she's just skinny. And how old is Jake Brokeback? 29? Taylor is 20? What the fuck are you doing with a girl 9 years younger than you? She's not even fully grown yet, bro. You could be letting 26 year old bitches who are desperate and having a crisis in their lives slobber all over your thangawangatwang and yet you wanna putz around with a 20 year old snob who will probably write a fucking song about you in 2 months. Incredible. I know if I was a 29 year old actor with a healthy beard, I wouldn't want a 20 year old girlfriend.Actually, yes I would. Play on playa.


P.S. Kim Kardashian has another boyfriend? It's OK because in her life she's been through a lot. Of dick.