Ben Rapelisberger Is Engaged And I Can't Even Get a Text Back?!?!

If Ben Roethlisberger is engaged to be married, he doesn't want to talk about it. But a lot of other people do.The social media have been all a-Twitter with congratulations for the Steelers quarterback, who purportedly popped the question to a young woman from Hickory, Lawrence County, over the Christmas holidays. Asked point blank today if he was engaged, Mr. Roethlisberger declined to answer, except to say he wouldn't talk about his private life. The young woman is being named on blogs and Tweets, but Post-Gazette attempts to reach her have not yet succeeded. Information developed by the newspaper shows her as a graduate of Laurel High School, where she was a softball star, and a 2008 graduate of St. Francis University in Loretto, Cambria County, with a bachelor's degree in health science, and, a year later, a master's of physicians assistant.

So let me get this straight. Big Ben rapes a college girl in a bathroom stall and ends up with a fiance? She aint just any broad off the street. A former softball star who has a bachelors and masters degree? She sounds delightful! A real take home to mommy type of gal. And isn't that what we're all after? A nice girl with a good brain(gives good brain, also), sweet ass, nice pair of double bubble twins, pretty face, down to drink beers, doesn't mind taking grandma to applebees, loves the sox/celts/pats, hates donahue and terrorism, shorter than you, likes springsteen but could recite lupe fiasco lyrics and can spread cream cheese on a bagel like you read about. I just got lost in my fantasy. She's real, I'm telling you. She's very real.




P.S. Spread cream cheese on a bagel? I just made it up. Think about it.