You Just Fucked With The Wrong Mascot.

Pucky the Whale was greeting people in the stands at a minor league hockey game when a drunken fan tackled and then punched him on Saturday, police said. Saturday’s Connecticut Family Whale evening game went from a G-rated event to something violent near section 105, all over a bet Kevin O’Connell, 28, of East Hartford, made with a friend, police said. As the hockey team’s mascot was greeting fans, O’Connell, attacked, police said. Immediately, dozens of upset parents reacted. They helped Hartford Police Officer John Zweibelson and the XL Center staff find O’Connell, who police said, was hiding in section 206.

28 seems a little too old to be getting into bets with your friends over tackling a mascot. Maybe I'm maturing. Listen, I'm all about shaking things up a bit and throwing elbows in public but not when it comes to my mascot. Pucky is our guy and when you attack one of our guys, you attack all of Whale nation. Plus you don't pull that shit in front of little kids. It's like an unwritten rule at sporting events. You don't curse or say inappropiate things when there's a family of young kids at a game. It's bad taste. Even I know that. Unless he's wearing a Kobe jersey and they just beat you in game 7. Then you can tell the little shit to go fuck himself and that his dad sucks balls. Whatever. You tell Kevin O'Connell of East Hartford that when it comes to me and him on the open ice, I'm putting him through a wall.

P.S. Dude nailed the mugshot though. If you're gonna get arrested for roughing up a mascot then you have to smile in the photo like a cold blooded killer. Let the world know you're coming for its ass.

Why Wasn't I Told Hayden Rocks Nipple Pasties?

The way I feel about nipple pasties is the same way I feel about people with Aids on an airplane. Get the fuck out of here with that shit. Nipple pasties are for the birds and you gotta let those things breathe. I'd rather people see the nips on my lady than a piece of white material to cover it up. What If I'm cold blooded? How am I supposed to know the temperature dropped outside? That's all I have to say about this subject.

The Wild Thing Goes To Rehab. Boooo!!!!!

After numerous stints in rehab, Charlie Sheen is about to receive some specialized care — and he doesn't even have to leave the house to get it. The 45-year-old actor — who was released from Cedars-Sinai Medical Center on Friday after two days on nonstop partying — will be receiving in-home care for his addiction issues. Sheen in rehab could cost crew of hit show "He's getting treatment done at home," a source tells UsMagazine.com of the troubled TV star. "He's doing rehab there."

Well there goes the life of the party. I seriously feel like all the air has gone out of my balloon. I wanted to go out with Charlie Sheen for the simple reason of live tweeting about it. Imagine the type of shenanigans he gets into on a Wednesday. I bet he makes blowing a line off a chick's ass and starting a bar brawl  look like church on Sunday morning. Are there Vegas odds made up yet that say rehab doesn't work for him and he's dead by 50? I'm jumping on those odds hard and putting the cat/manager/agent/CEO's house on it. My man Sheen lacks what we in the blogging biz call a moral compass and no rehab is going to make him get one. So I say fuck rehab. I've seen that Dr. Drew show and everybody ends up turning back into meth addicts and crack whores.  Let the Wild Thing be the Wild Thing and let him enjoy the next 5 years of his life in typical Rick Vaughn fashion. Cocaine, booze, porn stars. CBP, baby. CBP.

The Durantula Spits Venom

"I was talking to my teammate and [Bosh] decided he wanted to put his two cents into it," Durant explained after the 108-103 setback. "I am a quiet guy, laid-back guy, but I'm not going to let nobody talk trash to me. He's on a good team now so he thinks he can talk a little bit. There are a lot of fake tough guys in this league and he's one of them." Whoa, but Durant wasn't finished. "I'm no punk," he continued. "I wasn't even talking to him first off. He decided to butt in and I'm not going to just let that slide. Especially in our house. Like I said, he's not one of those guys I look at and say he has a rep for talking back to guys or getting into it. He's a nice guy. I'm not going to let that type of person say something to me like that."

I love this and then some. If Kevin Durant has to call you out about being an asshole then you know you're an asshole. And he actually points out what nobody else does about the Miami Heat. They're all a bunch of fake tough guys. Bosh might be the worst but Lebron and Wade are both phony in my eyes. One day they're asking why they're not loved and then next they're acting like the bad boys of the NBA with nothing to back it up. Maybe it's just me but I'm a big buyer in the stock that says you can only start talking shit once you've accomplished something and Bosh hasn't done shit. At least Lebron was was trying to turn Cleveland into a fake title contender so he can run his mouth but Bosh has no right to even breath Durant's air. It would be like Sellberg jumping on the blog again and acting like he runs this bitch. Wearing Ogling Ed Hochuli hoodies like he built it from the ground up or something.  Well not so fast, my friend. I'm the one people come to see. I put asses in the seats.

Katrina Kaif Hot Bikini

Katrina Kaif is an artist in Bollywood world. She is a pretty girl. Many films that have been starring by Katrina Kaif including De Dana Dan (2009), 7 Days in Paris (2010), Tees Maar Khan (2010), Raajneeti (2010) and coming soon in March 2011 is Indagi Na Milegi Dobara.

As a Hot Bikini model she will be increasingly sought after by many people especially the men. They just want to see a beautiful face and sexy body with clothing hot bikini although only in the photos.

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Blood. Sweat. Tears. Matt Damon.

How does my ass taste? Lauren Szurley told me I looked like Matt Damon in 9th grade and I'll never forget it. I don't care if it was just the booze talking at 7:25 in the morning. What? Don't judge. She had a really tough time adjusting to high school life.

Is It Gay To Want This Shirt?

 What's the largest human organ? No, it's not Rex Ryan's mouth. It's your skin, and the New York Rangers winger Sean Avery wants you to take care of it. Avery cares so much, in fact, that he posed nude (with the important parts covered by his hands) for a T-shirt aimed at raising awareness about skin cancer and melanoma. The shirt says "protect your largest organ," and is part of a campaign by the New York University Cancer Institute at NYU Langone Medical Center.

Call me whatever feminine names you want because then you're saying to care about Skin Cancer is gay. Who's the asshole now? 

Ana Ivanovic: Too sexy to win again

You'd usually think that there is no such thing as too sexy, but it turns out that Serbian tennis player Ana Ivanovic (who was ousted early from the Australian Open, and most majors as of late) is just a too sexy athlete.

The TennisReporters.net website has banned the Serbian stunner from its annual Sexiest Player Award readers poll. Ivanovic won it five straight times so the site owners decided it was time to let someone else in a short tennis dress and bloomers have a shot at the coveted title. But they decided to honour Ivanovic by naming the award the Ana Ivanovic Sexiest Player Award.

So, who succeeds Ana Ivanovic as the WTA's sexiest racket handler? Russian hottie Maria Kirilenko (right). The complete poll results were:

Maria Kirilenko Maria Sharapova Carolina Wozniacki Gisela Dulko Elena Vesnina Victoria Azarenka Julia Goerges Serena Williams Sania Mirza Jie Zheng

34.4 17.5 12.7 7.1 6.3 6.1 4.8 4.8 2.5 2.0

Some hotties, or at least cuties, received recognition for TennisReporters.net's readers in other categories as well. Here are the rest of the women's winners:
Player of the Year: Kim Clijsters
Youngster of the Year: Caroline Wozniacki
Most Improved: Vera Zvonareva
Tweeter of the Year: Andrea Petkovic (check out her victory dance)
Match of the Year: Sam Stosur vs. Serena Williams, French Open

This Kind Of Makes Me Want To Watch Two and a Half Men

Charlie Sheen had a "briefcase full of cocaine" delivered to his home -- and was using large amounts of the drug during the 36-hour bender that landed him in the hospital ... this according to a source inside the house. We're told Sheen had several people inside his home during the 36-hour span that started Tuesday night -- including 2 porn stars, a business associate, and several other women. After hours of drinking, we're told a person showed up to the house with a designer "briefcase" -- that contained multiple "bricks" of cocaine.We're told Sheen immediately began doing the drug for several hours.  Sheen was eventually hospitalized early Thursday morning for "severe abdominal pain." 
 
I don't watch Two and a Half Men. I'm not 40 and I think it's kind of creepy to watch 2 single dudes talk about sex and make jokes about it. But this makes it a little appealing because I wanna see how Charlie Sheen reacts to all this shit. The guy simply doesn't give a fuck. Was he trying to kill himself with a drug overdose? Maybe and wouldn't that be the ultimate way to go out for a Hollywood playboy? Briefcase of coke, porn stars and a wild sex party all apart of a 36 hour bender. Pretty fucking awesome if you ask me. I know that's how I'd wanna do it minus the porn stars. I like my females with a little more self respect. Not trying to mess around with some bitch who used to  get fingered by her daddy and her uncle and her uncle's daddy(so her grandpa?), which I guarantee is a plot to some fetish movie.

Jersey Shore Moving To Italy

After spending a season in Miami and then returning to their Seaside Heights home, the cast of MTV's hit reality series "Jersey Shore" is going international. While the show is still deep in its wildly successful new season, plans for the next batch of shows are already moving forward, as Snooki, Deena, JWoww, Sammi, Ronnie, Pauly D, Vinny and the Situation are headed to Italy. According to DJ Pauly D, it's still not clear exactly what the structure of the season will be or even where they will be based, though you can bet that the group's trip to the homeland should yield some hilarious cultural differences and fantastic breakdowns in communication. 

I feel like this is only way this show could continue to exist because right now it all seems too fake and too scripted. There's not a chance Pauly D and Snooki go to work at the T-shirt shop and don't get absolutely mobbed by fans and yet the show is edited and staged to look like it's real it's starting to piss me right the fuck off. They're getting paid $30,000.00 and they have to work at a shore store? Really? I mean I fully expect Vinny to ask for his line in tonight's episode. But going to a foreign land could be entertaining for a couple of reasons. First, these kids are gonna learn that real Italians are a tad different than their version ofItalian-Americans. Actually I'm pretty sure Jwoww is rish and Snooki is half Portuguese or some bullshit like that. And another reason is it's something new and fresh. We might actually get to see some spontaneous humor like Season 1 because that's what I miss most. It's like an athlete in their contract year. They didn't know if they were coming back the next year so they had to go all out and bring it 24/7.



P.S. I think The Situation is gay. I mean legitimately gay. I've never seen a guy talk himself out of getting laid so many times. 

Just Another Day For The Greatest Player In The World

Jimmer Fredette Is a Plain Jane.

All week long, everybody was talking about the epic clash between No. 4 San Diego State and No. 9 BYU. The two teams did not disappoint, providing a thrilling, memorable game. And in the end, the Cougars, and star Jimmer Fredette, who unleashed 43 points against the Aztecs, still has everybody talking. 

I don't get what all the excitement is about over this kid. He's like Adam Morrison 2.0 and we all know how that shit panned out. He gets to the basket a little bit better than JJ Redick but he's not the shooter he was and he's not playing ACC talent. This kid is boring. He's vanilla. I like some flavor in my milkshakes. Give me some chocolate and maybe a little splash of peanut butter chunks. Surprise me once in a while. Are people really saying Fredette is the best player in the country? I used to be one of the biggest Kemba Walker haters and even I can say he's absolutely gross. Can't hold Rondo's jockstrap but still pretty fucking good. So I guess I'll put up with the Jimmer Fredette hype for the next 3 months and maybe watch him march his team into the sweet 16 but after that it's over. Gordon Hayward was the next Larry Bird last year in the final 4 and now he's averaging 3.4 points a game over 11 minutes(Ya I googled that). The WAC conference is an absolute joke and the fact that they have two top 10 teams in their conference is fucking shameful. I'm sick of college basketball already. Wake me up when it's March Madness. Until then I'll be hanging with the big boys of the NBA in the real world.

Some Classic Chatroulette Sessions To Get Your Appetite All Jacked Up

Don't think I'm gonna be breaking out new outfits for the chatroulette circuit 2.0. It's gonna be bow tie, sport coat, glasses and my bare chest. Gotta put asses in the seats somehow, right? Same deal as before. Click on the photos to enlarge.

Poor Dog

What an asshole and I'm talking about the dude holding the camera. Forget the dog, forget any spilled drinks. The falling TV is the most important asset in the room and you're just gonna stand back and try to catch the carnage on film so you can post it on youtube? Fuck that. It's like something Donahue would do and then I'd be forced to slap the shit out of him and piss in his Wheaties. Talk about leaving your comrade in the trenches, taking grenades.

The Syracuse Season Through Scoop Jardine Photos

That's pretty accurate. I never fell in love with the team because I never trusted them from the beginning. There was no way they could be #3 in the country when they lost Wes Johnson, Rautins and Arinze from last season. I wasn't about to jump in bed and throw a ring on it without knowing what I was getting. Just not my style. I'm still bleeding out from the Patriots season and the NBA Finals in june. The bottom line is this team is a mess. They actually digust me. They define what it means to play slap dick basketball. No urgency, no heart. Everybody wants to play this hero ball. Well you know what I say? A hero is nothing but a fucking sandwich and I'm trying to cut carbohydrates out of my diet.

HE'S BACK!

This is the first time I've ever done this and will ever do it so don't expect it, ladies. This is how Perkins back in uniform makes me feel:  :) :) :)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



P.S. I don't care if you're Andy Roddick and married to Brooklyn Decker. No real man should ever use ":)" in a text, tweet, facebook comment or anything.

Just When I Thought It Was Safe To Go On ESPN.Com....

What the fuck is that? ESPN.com is my homepage and I've actually been avoiding it for the past week because of the whole Jets hype and all that shit. Today I thought I was safe just like yesterday was safe. But then God has to return to remind me that he hates me and I'm cursed for life. Just when my mood starts to turn to good, this shit happens and fucks my day up. That's all it does. Fucks my day up by reminding me of the single worst night in my entire life. Why not write about when Tom Brady led his offense down the field for a game winning field goal with 1:21 on the clock, on his own 15 and no timeouts? Or what about when he threw 3 Touchdowns for 345 yards and once again marched down the field with 1:08 remaining? OR the time he had his highest QB rating of his career against the NFL's top defense in capturing his 3rd championship ring in 4 years? No, let's talk about the flukiest fucking play in the history of sports. Fuck. You.

Is Derek Jeter Just Sitting On The Couch Or Something?

If Jeter ever moves then center field might fit? How much weight did he gain over this off season?!? Poor guy probably saw our lineup 1 through 9 and started popping pringles like you read about. No wonder him and Minka aren't engaged yet. His waistline just keeps getting bigger and bigger like a college freshman and she doesn't know if he'll return to form.

Tennis star Wozniacki doffs her top

Caroline Wozniacki has impressed a lot of people during the Australian Open. Last night she came from behind to get by Francesca Schiavone. Francesca Schiavone hits the ball hard and plays a bit different than most other players on tour. Some call Francesca Schiavone a man but she sure can play.

However, Wozniacki - playing her I won't be beat myself style - defeated her - and looked super cute doing it.
She looks even better in these bikini shots - especially when doffs her top.

I Think I Have a New Crush

If she wasn't so into chicks, I think I might friend request on Facebook like she's Rachel Uchitel or something. But isn't she living the dream right now? Full ride to UConn and she spends her day making trick shots while she rehabs her knee. Doesn't have to worry about media scrutiny or getting yelled at during practice. Go to class, pound a beer, make out with some girls and start chucking up the three ball from the upper deck. Just livin'. L-i-v-i-n.

I Could Have Had a Shot at Rachel Uchitel If I Friended Her On Facebook?

RACHEL Uchitel, one of the many women who slept with Tiger Woods, has a new boyfriend! In an interview with PopEater, the socialite revealed she’s met a “super cute” guy — on Facebook. “He friends me and he’s like ‘I’m this really nice, normal guy, if you ever want to go for coffee I’d love to take you out.’ So I looked at his picture and he’s super cute,” Rachel said. “I usually don’t go for people with looks. I’m more for personality and for someone who’s really strong. “I’m not this stalker of men. I’m just saying that I wanted love so bad. You know, I lost my fiance in the World Trade Center. I was prepared to be married, and I have been at that stage for a really long time where I want to have a teammate.

Call her mean names because she fucked around with a married man and is an emotional basket case. I don't care. I know hot when I see it and she's hot.  All this new dude did was friend her and send her some creepy inbox message? That's it? So what did Tiger have to do? Walk into her area code and she started the boing-boing dance? I guess I'm just mad at myself for never taking a shot. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Snooki said that, right? I'm not saying I'm some fucking stud that could have gotten Rachel Uchitel but I'm not bad by any means. I mean I'm not so much Mark Wahlberg as much as I'm Jim Halpert and chicks dig Jim Halpert. The real kicker is she doesn't even go for people with looks and is actually more into personality. Uhhhmmm hellloooo? Bring that white bikini and your weird left nipple on over. Let's lift our sleeves and bare our scars, love one another and maybe, just maybe we can walk through fire together.

Rex Ryan Is Out Of The Spotlight. I Feel Like I'm Reborn.

That's pretty much how I've felt for the past week. Just super sad and super angry that the Tom Terrific and the boys were sent home and the Jets were still alive. I was pretty much on the edge of the cliff and needed one more piece of bad news to send me over the edge. Then I get a call from God that tells me the Jets are down 24-3 at the half and it was like every drop of blood started to thaw in my body and I received a bit of an erection. I get off to justice and that game last night was fucking justice like you read about. Let New York stomp all over our field like they won the fucking Super Bowl and then have them get blown out through 30 minutes football, stage a comeback in the 4th quarter only to fall short for the second year in a row. I feel good. Like the return of chat roulette blog posts are coming back this week. That's how rejuvenated I am. I might even comb my hair tomorrow and I haven't done that shit since picture day in 3rd grade. Go ahead and laugh about it. Legend has it that any day at anytime, I could have plucked whatever young bitch off the bench and made her my wench when I was between the ages of 8-11.

Skating babe Phaneuf grabs national title

Last February, Canadian skating hottie Joannie Rochette captivated the world with the tragic story of losing her mother and then having to compete in the Olympics - as well as her skill and overall hotness. However, 2010 Vancouver and Whistler bronze medalist is not the only Canadian figure skating babe.

In 2004, Cynthia Phaneuf won a national title. She was expected to be a favourite to win more, but then there was Joannie Rochette. Rochette reeled off six straight titles with Phaneuf finished second three times and third once.

This past weekend, with Rochette concentrating on the pro ranks, claimed her second title at the BMO Skate Canada Nationals. When Phaneuf won her first title she was just a pretty teen. Now she has become a full-fledged hottie. Congrats!

Oh, to answer the obvious question, Phaneuf says she is not related to NHL star Dion Phaneuf of the lowly Toronto Maple Leafs.

Former Uconn hoops hottie Taurasi tests positive

While we think Diana Taurasi looks pretty great out of her Phoenix Mercury or Team USA basketball jersey, we know the former UConn standout loves to be in the gym. However, this hoops hottie (who posed nude for ESPN's Body Issue, above) might be forced to take a breather from the sport she loves.

Reportedly she has failed a drug test. The reports are that both samples tested positive for the banned stimulant modafinil. Taurasi has been dismissed from her Turkish club.

As reported by ESPN.com`s Mechelle Voepel, the positive tests could affect Taurasi`s future as a member of Team USA. She was expected to lead the U.S. squad in 2012 in London.
The WNBA has been quiet about the tests. We wonder if Taurasi bring her toned athletic bod back to the states to play this coming summer. Or maybe this hardwood hottie will have to stay home for a bit.

I Take It Back! I Take It Back! I Want a Green Bay/Pitt Super Bowl

It only took about 5 seconds of watching this game to remember how much I hate the Jets defense, LT, Braylon Edwards, Santonio Holmes and Rex Ryan. Fuck that fat foot fucking freak. Besides, it wasn't proved Big Ben raped that girl, right? Allegedly is the key word I'm standing behind. She probably led him on anyway. Chicks, man. Chicks.

This Was Me For The Past Week

What's The Over/Under On How Many STD's Were Transmitted During This Picture?

 

 Is it just me or is Snooki fat this season? She's always had some chub on her and shit but this season she just looks like an overweight gremlin. Nothing worse than a tubby chick who think she's hot shit. Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.

I Think I'm Rooting For The Jets Today. Am I Going To Hell? Probably(For like 8 other reasons but so is every gay dude, right?).

Brutal week. Brutal fucking week. I went through the stages of grief like Bambi did after his mother died. I was in complete shock and denial on Sunday and Monday then I was completely angry for 3 days then I cyrcled into depression where I spend 24 hours in a dark room with a bottle of Jack and a shotgun. I skipped the bargaining stage but I don't do that shit. I don't make deals with the devil. I take and take and leave no prisoners in my path. But here I am at acceptance. We got outplayed, out coached, out hustled, out hit, out everything you need to do to win a playoff game. I want the Jets to win for one reason and one reason only. I fucking hate Ben Roethilisberger. I'd even go as far as to say I want his head on a platter. I've said this for a while now and I'll say it again. I don't like being friendly with a guy who has been accused of sexual assault twice in his life. Just not the kind of company I'd like to keep.  Maybe he raped the girl in the bar bathroom, maybe he didn't. I don't know, I'm not on fucking CSI but I'd put my money on he did something you're not supposed to do and that's where I leave it. He's a scumbag and if he wins today, he's on Tom Brady's level and I can't accept that. On the side we have Mark Sanchez and I gotta confess, I love him. He's a stud, looks like Vinny Chase, has big brass balls and makes big plays. I also feel bad for him because Sean Avery stole his gilrfriend and that shit hurts. I wouldn't even wish that upon on my worst enemy. The hurt from a lady is totally different than the hurt from a football. One stings and goes away with time but the other leaves you feeling empty and hopeless. No fun. Now having said all this, I hope New York gets absolutely stomped the fuck out in the Super Bowl to Green Bay. I'd rather see them win today, talk shit for two weeks and then get emasculated on the biggest stage in sports.

Weird.

A couple of former Red Sox are reuniting in another American League East city. The Tampa Bay Rays have agreed to one-year deals with free agents Johnny Damon and Manny Ramirez, sources confirmed to ESPN.com. Damon agreed to a one-year deal worth $5.25 million plus incentives and Ramirez one year at $2 million, according to SI.com. Both deals are pending physicals. Damon will likely play left field and Ramirez designated hitter. The moves mark the first major additions for the AL East champions after a devastating offseason in which one prominent player after another left cost-conscious Tampa Bay.


This is gross. Johnny Damon is really worth twice as much as Manny? Fuck these dudes and fuck them with an Aids dick. I might hate Johnny Damon more than I hate Lebron James and that's saying a lot. It's like ever since we told him to kiss our ass in 2004, he takes every opportunity to try and stick it to us. He went to New York  then refused to come to Boston when we tried to trade for him last year and now he's signing with Tampa so he can face us 18 times a year. Hey asshole, we don't miss you and we never did. We're a 10 and you're a 6. We were too good to be with you in the first place. You should be thrilled we even let you in our bed. As for Manny Ramirez, whatever. I think he's gonna die in a few years from a freak grilling accident. That type of thing happens to those types of people.

Which tennis star do you want to see in her bra and panties?

Did you hear that Rafael Nadal is stripping off for a Emporio Armani ad campaign? The better news is that the campaign also includes Transformers hottie Megan Fox in lingerie in separate ads.

Pics of her inspired a few things ... the stuff we can talk about is the conversation of which tennis hottie you would most want to see in her underwear?

Personally? I'd pick Ana Ivanovic. Although the 2008 French Open champ already flamed out at this year's Australian Open, I still think she is a beauty! I'd like to see her in her undies or at least in a bikini like in this Sports Illustrated photo above.

Who would you pick?
Ana Ivanovic?
Maria Sharpova?
Jelena Jankovic?
Tatiana Golovin?
Jelena Dokic?
Gisela Dulko?
Sania Mirza?
Serena Williams?
Ashley Harkleroad (we have seen her in much less)?
Maria Kirilenko?
Or someone else? (We left off Anna Kournikova, as she is kind of retired and would likely win in a landslide!!!)

Fox, Nadal show off bods for Armani

The debate continues to rage as to whether Swiss superstar Roger Federer or Spanish sensation Rafael Nadal is the best tennis player of all-time (with Pistol Pete Sampras also getting some much deserved attention). However, we certainly have never seen Nadal or Sampras posing like this.

Nadal is the new male body for the Emporio Armani jeans, lingerie and underwear brand. The female body? For the second season, Transformers, Jennifer's Body, Whore and Jonah Hex hottie Megan Fox. I certainly prefer to see her in her undies than Nadal! I wonder how she is with a racket?

Football Season Is Over As Far As I'm Concerned

I don't give a fuck about the AFC Championship and I don't give a fuck about the NFC Championship. I don't even care about watching the Super Bowl when it happens. I'm absolutely dead inside when it comes to football. I keep hoping that I'll wake up from this nightmare and the Patriots game will just be starting. I think the worst part about it is that we murdered all 4 teams left in the playoffs. Green Bay is the only squad that deserves to get another shot at us because we dumped 45 points on New York and then completely emasculated Pitt and Chicago in their house. It motherfucking sucks. That's all I can say about it. And if I watch football or see anymore coverage about the upcoming games I think I might have a heart attack at 21 years old. If Big Ben wins another ring then he'll be on Brady's level. Can't have that. I can't deal with any of it. It's just all too soon for me. It would be like getting divorced and then expected to go to your ex-wife's wedding two weeks later.




P.S. Go Packers.

Is This Look In?

You rock the super dorky glasses because then it looks cool like you're not even trying? Real original....

Pretty sure I was already bringing the heat with that look on chat roulette back in February of 2010. It seriously feels like I'm running circles around everyone.

Al Davis Looks Well.

Whatever. Just Another Day In The Life of a Teen Mom Cast Member

I don't know how to put it lightly so I'll just say it. The best thing that could happen to this girl is nothing short of death. Doesn't have to be messy or tragic. I know a guy who does clean work. It'll be good for her, good for you, and good for the kid she obviously doesn't give a fuck about.

Fake Valet Service Steals New Mother's Car

LOWELL, Mass. -- Police say a fake valet at a Massachusetts emergency room offered to park a pregnant woman's car, then drove away with it. Lowell police Capt. Kelly Richardson tells the Boston Herald that the woman drove herself to Lowell General Hospital at 3 a.m. Friday while suffering labor pains. She parked outside the emergency room doors and was met by a man wearing a uniform-style shirt who introduced himself as the valet. The man said she couldn't park there but volunteered to take her keys and move the car. Then, police say, he drove away. While being admitted, the woman was told the hospital didn't offer a valet service. The car was found Saturday morning. Police are examining it for fingerprints and other evidence to try to find the suspect.

I've always wondered why this didn't happen more often along with other easy crimes. For example, the book buybacks at school is too easy. You have a 8 hour window everyday for a week with kids who walk out of the store, holding fresh dollar bills in their pocket. How hard would it be to jump a Jordon Brault looking character and nab his money? This is why I'm always on edge. I'm not a very big dude. I mean don't try me because I'll fight to the bloody end but chances are that I'm going down a dead man if I ever get attacked. I'm just saying you never know when someone is gonna try to throw you a curve ball. "Oh you're the valet and you wanna park my car? Fuck off, bro. I'm not retarded. I can do that shit myself. Let me see some credentials or beat it." That's actually how you get rid of any suspicious activity. Ask for the credentials. I do it random Mexicans all the time. Demand their marching papers and shit. You'd be surprised how nice they start acting after that. ANYWAY I don't feel any sympathy for this chick and her new baby. Maybe don't get pregnant or maybe don't be an idiot. What kind of hospital has a valet service? Did you expect to get champagne upon arrival? Maybe have everybody in your life stand at the door and give you a standing ovation after the baby comes out. Wake up, bitch. Life is no fairytale.

I'm So Sick Of This Shit

This is Matt Carle's first NHL fight. Sean Avery proceeded to smash his head in three times here. While he was down. He is scum, and that's putting it lightly.  Oh, and for any Rangers fans trying to compare this to Dan Carcillo's beatdown of Marian Gaborik a year ago. A) Gaborik started that, and B) Carcillo actually caught Gaborik on his way down. The Rangers were losing 3-0 tonight and they decided to goon it up, and unfortunately, it almost worked for them.

Hey asshole. This is hockey. This isn't the fucking food stamps line. If you don't want to get hit by a train, then don't run in front of it. What was Avery supposed to do? Let some little bitch hold him up? Fuck that. You know exactly what you're setting yourself up for when you try to tangle with the pest. Clearly one clean knockout punch wasn't enough. Another three were needed to knock some sense into this clown. Sean Avery can do no wrong in my eyes.

Venus turns heads with short dress

Venus Williams has attracted a lot of attention at the Australian Open with a micro dress. The super short blue dress also included a zipper that went all the way down the front.
Williams, sister of Serena Williams, said the outfit could have become even more risque as she had flesh-colored shorts she could have worn under it. It might have looked kind of like this. Instead, she opted for black shorts and attracted a lot of attention anyway.
Check out more pics of the dress on NESN.

Hot or not: Sam Stosur

The 6th-ranked player in the world, Sam Stosur, has a lot of attention on her at the Australian Open. The top-ranked Aussie player has people talking about whether she can be the first Australian player to win the tournament since the 1970s.

So, the big question, is she hot? Stosur has a nice smile and a laid-back, sweet kind of vibe. She also has an amazing set of arms. Some guys might not like that, but she certainly is in amazing shape.

Check out an interview with her from the French Open. Also, check her out in Inside Sport.

Australian Open cutie makes racket pay!

While friend Caroline Wozniacki has been one of the biggest stories as this year's Australian Open got underway, Agnieszka Radwanska grabbed some headlines and video views recently. The Polish tennis playing cutie took out her frustrations on her racket during a match. Finally the racket (or is it racquet) could take no more and the racket head came flying off. She was able to recover and actually win the match.
Check out the incident here.

FUCK OFF

.

Let me give you a little taste of what melba toast is packing right now. I was just notified my adsense account was disabled today because of fraudulent clicks. In other words, they noticed the same people were clicking on the same ads and doing it way too often. After the game yesterday I thought I lost the ability to get heated. I was all sad and shit and woe is me attitude. Like just maybe I was starting to lose my fastball and it was time to reinvent myself. Not so fast, my friend. I don't know what murder is like but I'm willing to fucking find out right now. Maybe arson. Throw your grandma in a shed and watch that bitch go up in smoke. I don't give a fuck because I have nothing left. 2 years of my life are gone. Gone. gone, gone, gone, motherfucking gone. I was $5 away from banking that $100 check. You might say it's pretty fucking pathetic that I was waiting that long for such a small amount of money but whatever. It was bigger than money. This was my baby. This was my project. This was the first time in my fucking life where I could point to something and be proud of it. And now it's gone without a warning? I'm an asshole but even I would have gave my most hated enemy a heads up that his empire was about to burn if he didn't change some shit. First the Pats and now this? I've never had a problem with God but if this is his way of calling me out then let's get to getting it the fuck on, you big mystical fuck. I aint hard to find. Bring your crew of angels or whoever you roll with. Me and Brady will be waiting. 12 rounds, no gloves.

Ugh.

Really? I'm hanging by a thread here. I'm reading don't kill myself books and you're gonna go out and show off both chesticles with your 60 year old boyfriend? Why was she even at the Golden Globes? Was she nominated for most ungrateful whore? Cause she would definitely win that one. I could actually come up with a list of 8 people who could win it.

Classic.

After We Are Marshall, January Jones still turning heads

Forget about The Social Network, Natalie Portman, Paul Giamatti, Jim Parsons or Annette Benning, the real star of the 2010 Golden Globes was January Jones and her amazing dress. The Mad Men beauty stunned everyone with a dress that showed off her slim figure and highlighted her breasts. That hair and those eyes certainly helped the look as well.

The other night I was channel surfing and came across January Jones in the 2006 movie We Are Marshall on Peachtree TV. I had forgotten she was in it. She looked pretty good in the story about the Marshall team that played after the plane crash that took the lives of 55 players, 12 coaches and four others.

I had forgotten about the trio of hotties that lit up the screen in We Are Marshall. As well as January Jones, the Matthew McConaughey and Matthew Fox film featured the always cute Kate Mara (why oh why did you leave Entourage so soon?) and Kim Williams-Paisley (wife of country singer Brad Paisely).

I Feel Like a Yankee Fan

I can't get over it. I feel 10 times more sick than I did after game 7 of the NBA Finals.  Going into that game, there was a good chance we were gonna lose. No Perkins, LA Home floor, Kobe in a must win game, yada, yada, yada. There was no way we were losing yesterday. Our field, full healthy squad, Tom Brady in a must win game. I want to puke on everything and I want to slap everyone. I can't even read the sports page or turn on the TV without Braylon Edwards and Bart Scott doing the Jet dance. And the worst part about it is they fucking earned it. They talked the talk and walked the walk. They backed up everything and we can't do shit except hold onto our loved ones in a tiny village and get verbally bombed like it's fucking Hiroshima all over again. I don't fucking know. Food has no taste, the world is grey, showering is out of the question for today and all hopes and dreams of a better tomorrow seem highly unlikely. You're out of your fucking mind if you think I can blog today. I can barely inhale without thinking about yesterday.

I Don't Know What I'm Living For Anymore.

I keep repeating the same thing in my head over and over again. This was our year. This was our motherfucking year. Tom Terrific was playing out of his ass, the young defense was putting it together, Belichick did arguably his best coaching job of his career. Everything was right. There wasn't one fucking flaw on this team. And who do we get to play in our house? The team we mopped the floor with a month ago and beat their ass 45 to 3. 45 POINTS TO FUCKING 3. It was all matching up perfectly. They talked shit all week and it was all supposed to come to a stop on Sunday night when we run them 6 feet under. So what happened? Everything you wouldn't expect. Turnovers, dropped passes, bad throws from Jesus himself, missed assignments on defense, piss poor tackling, played with no heart and no fucking urgency. AWEIPOHAGOIHG!!!!!11 Whatever. Not gonna dwell on it because the bottom line is this. I'm gonna keep on loving you 'cause it's the only thing I wanna do. I don't wanna sleep, I just wanna keep on loving you.





P.S. I am gonna dwell on it and probably get 3 hours of sleep tonight and rest of the week.

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P.S. On a completely unrelated note, I always forget Louisville is in the Big East.