A polar bear attacked a woman at Berlin Zoo Friday afternoon after she climbed a fence and jumped into its habitat during feeding time, police said Saturday. One adult polar bit her several times after she plunged into the moat, police said. Zoo workers tossed rescue rings toward the woman to hoist her out and distract polar bears swimming nearby, said Goerg Gebhard, a Berlin police officer.
What exactly did this bitch think was gonna happen? I hope we're not supposed to be shocked or appalled at the aggressive polar bear here. I mean how fucking dumb do you have to be? You come into the kitchen, you're gonna get burned. Or you literally jump into a bear pit during feeding time and you're gonna get mauled. I actually respect the bear here. Even he didn't really want a piece of that fat tub of lard. Just a few flesh wounds here and there. Polar bears are no joke man. They get a bad rep as being cuddly little shits and we can thank for this crazy german lady for correcting us. Seriously. I'm still stumped by this move. Some days you look at society and marvel at how far we have come and then we have days like this to bring us all the way back.
P.S. If you're ever in the Syracuse area I'd look up a canadien chef named Doug and inquire about a pool party. Just tell him 'Dude' sent ya.
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