Hi, My Name Is Kirk Hinrich and I Have a Vagina.

Nice wrist tape bro. Strain it when you were fingering yourself? Maybe you like it when your coach tweeks your nipples too. Purr you pussy.

Joltin' Joe Has Left And Gone Away?

CORNWALL, Conn. -- Connecticut state police have arrested two suspects in a Cornwall bank robbery after the alleged robber from New York state broke his leg and lost the cash while fleeing.Jason Durant, 32, of Millerton N.Y., and Crystal Eyler, 27, of Sharon are charged with Tuesday's holdup. Durant is charged with the actual robbery while Eyler, his girlfriend, is accused of conspiracy. Both were arrested Wednesday after Durant went to New Milford Hospital. State police said after robbing the National Iron Bank at gunpoint, Durant tumbled down a steep embankment behind the bank and broke his leg in several places. Troopers said as he fell, Durant dropped his gun and money fell out of his pockets, leaving him with only $2 from the heist.

I think Jason Durant had a vision of how his robbery was going to go and this would have fallen under his worse case scenario column. I don't know if it's worse to break your leg in mid robbery or to be found with only $2 in your pocket. You can't even get 2 McDoubles with that(unless he had 12 cents on him. Yes, I'm a dollar menunaire). Like that shit is just insulting and to make matters worse, his girlfriend was with him. You picked a real winner hunny. I just hope this wasn't a first date. I'm not a betting man but if I was, I'd say there wouldn't be a 2nd date. I don't know, just got a gut feeling about that one.

I Guess I Missed You?

More details from Sports Illustrated writer Selena Roberts' book "A-Rod" were released Wednesday by the New York Daily News. The book alleges Rodriguez did not stop using steroids when he came to the Yankees and he might have been using as far back as high school, the Daily News reports. Roberts broke the story that A-Rod failed a steroid test in 2003. Yankees teammates, Roberts writes, nicknamed Rodriguez "B---h T--s" in 2005 because he put on 15 pounds in the offseason which included round pectorals, a condition called gynecomastia that can be caused by anabolic steroids. • A-Rod "pitch tipped" when he played for the Rangers by letting opponents at the plate know which pitch was coming in lopsided games. A-Rod expected players he helped would reciprocate when he was having an off night and needed to get his batting average up. • A-Rod's off-the-field antics including his poker habit; his divorce from his wife, Cynthia; his relationship with Madonna and his other affairs are detailed. • A-Rod was hated at Hooters, where he tipped the minimum 15 percent.

Bahahahaaa. Not only was A-roid hated at Hooters but his teammates called him Bitch Tits? I've only called one kid bitch tits consistently and that was only because we absolutely hated him. What up Chris Sherman? He's actually saved in my phone under bitch tits. But I mean A-roid actually had a pair of bitch tits. and how about the "pitch tip"? Way to keep the integrity of the game there, Alex. Just because you go sticking needles in your ass, cheating your way through life in baseball and your marriage, doesn't mean you gotta bring down other players with you. I'm not upset if A-roid didn't tip well at Hooters. Those waitresses aren't capable of judgement and even if they were, who cares? They're whores.

Side Boob Of The Day

Thanks for the swine flu bitch. And the cocaine. Honestly, can we just blow Mexico off the map? What positive influence do they have on the world?

Please Stop.

3 words. Cut.The.Shit. I can't taking anymore overtime games. My weakened heart cannot possibly go through another night like the past 5 games. Chicago is good but they're not that good. Like they're not take me overtime, break my heart, and beat the defending champs type of good. 's Honestly, if the C's lost last night just minutes after the Rangers blew it in the 3rd period and Javy Lopez dropping the ball on first base, I might not be alive today. By the way, fuck Javier Lopez. Why does this dude keep getting opportunities? I understand you wanna get your pitchers some early innings but come the fuck on man. He sucks. He's garbage. He hasn't done a positive thing all year and I hope he never does. Because he sucks and I hate him. and it wouldn't shock me if he smelled like pickles. You know who else can eat a dick? Brad Miller. Oh, you got hit with a hard foul in the playoffs? BOO FUCKING HOO. You just got Rondo'd motherfucker. Rondo is a third of your size and you're asking for a flagrant foul. Really? Because I think a real man would walk his ass down the court and get him some revenge. Not cry, not hold your cheek 'cause your tooth hurts and you need mommy to patch you up. No, you get your ass on defense and you start banging bodies in the paint. I guess it wouldn't matter though because Perk would just dominate you again like the previous 53 minutes of basketball. Let's fucking go Boston. Put these bitches to bed and let Brad Miller visit his dentist. Puh-puh-leaseeeeeee win tomorrow night. Maybe even bring KG back and I'll legit be wet in my pants. And we're not talking urine hunny. Wait what? Yeah, another 28 point, 8 assist, 7 board performance from Rondo and this place is gonna be goddamn pool.

It's Over.

WASHINGTON - After benching Sean Avery in Game 5 for costly penalties in Game 4, Rangers coach John Tortorella had nothing but praise for No. 16 last night. Avery played 20:59, registered an assist, had four hits and five shot attempts. "I thought Sean played so well," Tortorella said. "Where Sean played is where he has to play - he has to be on edge, he has to be right there on the edge, but also stay within himself. It's a tough thing to do for a player and especially the world he lives in and I think he's going to be in that world for quite awhile in the National Hockey League. There are some things that go on around him during a game that doesn't go on around a lot of other players. Sean and I have talked; that's the world he's in and he's going to have to accept it and tonight he was one of our best as far as keeping the puck."

Hockey season is over as far as I'm concerned. Rangers blew the 3-1 series lead last night in game 7 and Sean Avery was no where close to the blame. I mean the man can't do everything. You gotta decide whether you want dessert or disaster with that guy. He gets praised for playing on the edge but then gets his ass kicked once he crosses that line. Hockey is just boring without him on the ice. I refuse to watch a punk like ovechkin and a pussy like crosby go at it. I'm officially nominating Sean Avery for the medal of merit award.

Side Boob Of The Day

we all win today

Funny Story. This Kid Was On Room Raiders.

Hey I thought they only let D-bags make a fool of themselves on that show. Oh, that's right. I guess they proved my theory to be true. In all honesty, I just have one thing to say. Really? Like really bro? You thought it would be a good idea to go on MTV in your spare time and let the entire country know you watch ebony porn. Really? That wasn't even a joke. I wish I could make that shit up. Keep working on those abs, you look terrific. At least you didn't make a complete fool of yourself. Oh, you walked off the show with another chicks bra on your head? That's...uhh...cool...

Sox Won 11 In a Row And That Doesn't Even Satisfy Me.

Big night. Big motherfucking night. Our drug dealers south of the boarder would even say tonight is grande, if you will. We got game 7 of the NHL playoffs bitches. It's Sean Avery vs. everyone from Washington. No doubt my guy needs to get his hitting game going. Finish those checks, get the puck in the slot and fire away. Make sure his direction finder is not off. That's the only hockey lingo I got. It's cup or bust as far as I'm concerned. Celts on tonight. game 5. Stop fucking around out there boys. If they make Ben Gordon look like a fucking all star one more time I'm gonna hop off the couch and teach those motherfuckers how to play defense. Usually when you're up by 3, it's probably best to cover their best outside shooter. I don't know, that just seems most logical in that situation. I really don't give a shit about this team winning a championship last year. You used to be able to go to Africa and buy someone to mow your lawn but you don't see kunta kintai manning a weed whacker. That was then, this is now. That game 4 loss was despicable. I'd have my guys running sprints that next day, doing defensive slides for 90 minutes. Kevin Garnett is not walking through that door and neither is another ring obviously. Fuck it. This team just upsets me right now. Rule #76: No excuses, play like a champion.

Weekly One Tree Hill Post.

I wish I knew how to quit you, Lucas Scott. The show is boring. It's what one would call a bor-a-thon. It had less suspense than the Hills last night when Brody and that slut hooked up but they didn't show it and they tried to make a dramatic but Brody just ruined it like a G and spilled the beans as he fell on the hammock. Classic. I didn't really have any issues on last nights episode. That's not true. Apparently a 25 year old guy taking a 5 year old boy to a school dance isn't sketchy? I mean I know if I was a teacher, I think I'd sit a guy named "skills" down and ask about his intentions with one of my students. And when do 5 year olds go to school dances? The little guy even asked a chick to go with him who had like 3 front teeth missing. Yeah. Jackpot if you catch my drift. You usually have to pay for shit like that in Tiajuana. Nick Lachey obviously is in need of money. And I gotta say he's kind of a scum bag. Him and that haley broad were giving each other googly eyes the entire time. Lost a lot of respect for him out there. I used to give him the benefit of the doubt but no more. Next time he wants to kick his ball to improve his lie, I'm putting a stroke down on his card. Then I'll pull it. Ya follow? What else. I guess Peyton is still pregnant and apparently she might die. I don't want to say it for baby ears over here but it rhymes with shmooshmortion and it seems to be the only logical solution. Or throw yourself down some stairs. I got nothing else. I was just dissappointed with how Lachey carried himself in his tight beef cake shirt. So what? So lets dance!

Side Boob Of The Day

We're at the point where I don't even know who these chicks are anymore. I just see side boob and make these bitches famous.



Yup it's gonna be that type of day.

Lets Get Married

HARTFORD, Conn. -- A lawsuit has been filed by the state against Classic Images, a bridal shop that closed abruptly and left several orders unfilled, Attorney General Richard Blumenthal said Monday. The lawsuit was filed by Blumenthal and Department of Consumer Protection Commissioner Jerry Farrell Jr. against that Danielson bridal shop after 18 women reported that their orders with the business were unfilled after the shop closed. Classic Images sold bridal dresses, bridal party dresses, groom attire and accessories, and cleaned and stored wedding dresses for more than a decade before closing late last year, Blumenthal said. He said the "runaway bridal shop" failed to fulfill orders starting more than a year before closing.

I may be young and naive but if there is one thing I know about it is in the realm of dresses and weddings. What, that's gay? Regardless, how are you not gonna fulfill your responsibility to a woman on the happiest day of her/his(gays) life? I just want to know what the protocol is for situations like these. I'll be damned if my lucky lady is slumming it in some store called funky fresh threads because some fat bitch couldn't keep her promise. This aint the Steve Miller Band hunny. You can't just take the money and run. If I was one of these 18 brides I would track down this seamstress and tell her to get her ass in that shop and make my fucking gown or the story ends with her going through a wall.

My Best Friends Wedding having the most underrated soundtrack of all time? I think so.

Ben Gordon Would Like You To Know That Aint No Sock In His Crotch

skip to the 1:10 mark to see Ben Gordon tell us he's the full package. Real class act that guy is. Where did he go to school? Oh, yeah. He's a product of the Connecticut state school system.

The Dream Continues...

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — The Jacksonville Jaguars agreed to terms with 18 undrafted free agents Sunday night, including former Connecticut quarterback Tyler Lorenzen. Lorenzen will join the Jaguars as a tight end in next weekend's three-day minicamp.

Yeah, that picture is from his very own facebook. We're mutual friends. What of it? I may have had beers and hotdogs with him all day at a concert. discussed the state of syracuse football and when the issue of Mike Williams being suspended came up, Mr. Lorenzen replied with, "good, that kid was a dick." but that's a different story for a different time. Lorenzen is now a tight end? You don't gotta tell me twice if you know what I'm sayin'. Any man who can consistently run it back in horse shoes can certainly make it in the league.

Side Boob Of The Day

I think steroids are as american as apple pie

Do You Like Apples??

Well Jacoby Ellsbury just stole home. How do you like them apples? bahahaaaa suck one yankee fans. Mainly Sellberg.

Well That Sucked

Ugh. Long sigh.

Wait. Money Can't Buy Happiness?

$201 Million bones later and you're about to get swept tonight. Get the brooms out bitches. At least Burnett didn't blow his load early when the lights come on like the rest of those Yankees (See: A-roid, CC, soon to be teixeira). Oh. Rightttt. 8 Earned runs in 5 innings? bahahahahahahaaa

Falcon Freaks.

NEW HAVEN, Conn. -- Residents said they're not happy that Albertus Magnus College in New Haven cut down dozens of trees on Earth Day as part of its expansion efforts.Trees used to line Prospect Street, residents said, but now there are just cut-up logs."It's all pretty destructive and brutal and seems pretty uncalled for considering promises they made at City Hall to consult with residential neighborhoods," resident Harvey Weiss said.Trees were cut down on Earth Day in several areas on the school's campus. Residents said the school has been talking about expanding some of its buildings and parking lots.

I think it's safe to say I know a thing or two about Albertus and those trees needed to fucking go. Trust me. There was a solid row of 30 pine trees and I would look out my window everyday and see nothing but green. How was I supposed to scope all the fat/black girls walking to class? Do you think this story would even be in the news if it wasn't earth day? What is earth day anyway? Those trees were dead. I have a scar on my left arm from drunkenly walking into several dead branches. I want to know what great expansion plans they have to. Last I checked there were only 6 buildings on campus and 3 of them were dorms. But I mean it's a decent establishment.

You Local Retard, I'm The King Of The World So The King Of Your City By Default

NEW YORK -- Rangers coach John Tortorella has been suspended by the NHL for one game because he squirted a fan with water and threw a water bottle into the stands, striking a spectator in Washington. At 6:33 of the third period, Tortorella got into a verbal confrontation with a fan behind the bench. A video replay showed the coach heaving a green water bottle into the crowd. Tortorella then grabbed forward Aaron Voros' stick and held it high, waving it in the fan's direction.

What a fucking hypocrite. Isn't this the same guy who benched Avery for squirting his bottle at a reporter and taking silly penalties? You're fucking right. Now the dbag just got suspended for being a complete asshole. You might say Sean Avery and his antics don't belong in the league but neither does some old bastard in a suit threatening to fight me through some plexiglass. I just can't wrap my head around this one. Bench Sean Avery and you lost 4-0. Now you bench yourself and the only one who loses is the NHL front office. My only solution is to bring back my man Shanahan. Shanny was the only guy who could keep Avery in line and that's a known fact. You only gotta play 2 periods of NHL 2009 to notice that. He's like the nesty to my rza. Like a bridge over troubled water, I will ease your mind.

Side Boob Of The Day

Nice schnoz.

"You Should Never Let a Chick Get Into Your Head. That's Why I Prefer To Not Even Talk To My Dates"

A Malaysian woman gathering fruit in a tree was shot by her neighbor after he thought she was a monkey.

Pahang state police said the volunteer Security Corps member came home and saw rustling in one of his trees and fired at what he thought was a monkey. It was only after the woman started screaming that he realized it was his neighbor gathering the sapodilla fruit. The Kuala Lumpur victim was hospitalized with a wound to the abdomen. She was in stable condition Friday. An investigation into the incident is continuing. The shooter could face charges for illegally discharging a firearm, which carries a maximum prison term of two years.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Do you sense a little monkey business going on here? I guess the only thing you can say is that justice was served. I mean how ugly do you have to be to fucking mistaken for a monkey? the ex-soviet in me says one was putting the other out of its misery. The irish part says I'm too drunk to read. But seriously now. The shooter could face charges for illegally discharching a firearm. What the fuck does that even mean? Wheres the charge of shooting your neighbor? All I know is if you can get away with shooting bitches because you thought they were a monkey, I know plenty of females who could use a mistaken bullet in the head.

P.S. Sellberg quit the biz so he could kiss more trouser snakes apparently. Cool, dude.

Side Boob Of The Day

You want your side boob? There is your fucking side boob. Have a great weekend bitches.

YOOOUUUKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just give the man his MVP trophy already. We'll take back those world series rings too. "Lets gooo Bostonnnn"

Just When I Thought I Was Out....They Pull Me Right Back In

I'll tell ya what. Sean Avery doesn't get benched tonight and London doesn't come out with some tomfoolery about the Super Bowl moving there, I probably ride off into the sun set with my dignity. But no. I'm back to take what is mine. I want to quit badly but the people needed someone to believe in. Hate it or love it. A lot of you motherfuckers think you know just who this guy is. There comes a time in every mans life when he has to take a look in the mirror and decide just who he is. Well, I've to that cross road and I've decided I'm a man. I'm an athlete. And I'm a lover. But the most I am, I mean the most, is a god damn champion. And the one thing a champion does not do is fucking quit. A true champion faces his enemies and he conquers them. And that is why I'm here today to tell you I am officially re-accepting my job as Dr. cock n balls. Remember that day where I taught ya'll to make it rain? That's what I'm gonna be doing every single night. Dollar. Dollar. Bills ya'll. Anyway. Aves gets benched for being awesome. Sorry the guy likes to bring the fucking thunder every night. I really don't care to watch hockey unless my boy is on the ice so that's all I'm gonna say about that. I'm told the Rangers lost 4-0. Are you surprised? Look at the bullshit that pops up when you try to put guys like us down. Assholes-1 World-0.

I Quit.

24 hours left of this blog and it's gone. Came in like a fucking comet and now it's gone.

Lets Get It On.

Joba Chamberlain, the Yankees' starter in the series opener Friday, has made something of a habit of throwing at Red Sox hitters -- namely, Kevin Youkilis, who has been buzzed by Chamberlain four times since 2007. But has that helped him get inside their heads? Judging by David Ortiz's comments to the New York Post this morning, it's not out of the realm of possibility: "None of that, man -- just play the game the way it's supposed to be, and that's about it," Ortiz said, referring to Chamberlain. "This is a guy, as good as he is, the next step for him will be to earn respect from everybody in the league. He's not a bad guy, but when things like that happen, people get the wrong idea."

Ohhh babbbyyy. I'm ready to go right now. In other words, do not fuck with us. You can bet your ass that if this Joba fucker tries any tough guy shit on the sox then Beckett or Lester will be up there to drill any of those little clean cut bitches right in the noggin. Who is this guy anyway? Sure, he's good but he's not great. Nothing special. The bottom line is this kid hasn't earned respect from anybody in the league. He's like the dude at a party that no one knows and you just keep crossing his name off the pong list and ignoring all of his comments because you know he just wants to throw in his 2 cents so people acknowledge him. The kid who starts a fight and gets his ass kicked and not a soul stops it because no one knows him or respects him. You just walk away saying, "Donahue had it coming man." Follow me now. Joba is a career number 3 starter at best and where I come from they have no busisness throwing at the head of MVP candidates.

It's Been Some Time Since A Sean Avery Post

Wednesday night was as close as we've seen Sean Avery to a meltdown in hockey since he's returned to the National Hockey League. Rangers head coach John Tortorella is furious with Avery after he squirted water inexplicably at TSN game analyst Ray Ferraro in the first period of Wednesday's game. In the third period, it really got ugly when Avery took a roughing penalty for his shot to the face of defenceman Milan Jurcina. He couldn't believe the penalty and went back to plead his case before being told to sit down and be quiet by Tortorella. Late in the third period, with just over three minutes left, he high-sticks Brian Pothier and again Tortorella is left to scratch his head.

Yeah, I'm in math right now. You might ask why I'm on my laptop and I might not have answer for you. Some program with slopes and all that tomfoolery. Who needs that bullshit says I. If I had my druthers, algebra would be on the same plane of importance as getting your oil changed every 3,000 miles. But how bout our guy Sean Avery? Rehabilitated no more. I don't even care about the blatant elbow or high sticking. My favorite part from last night was when he squirted that Ferraro character with the water bottle. That is classic pest 101. I'm not saying he's not an asshole but you gotta be able to just laugh some of this shit off. Now his team is up 3-1 and the only people complaining about him are these purist, save face hockey analysts. Works hard and plays hard. We can all learn a little bit from Sean Avery. I realize I'm not as good as this when I have a calculator in one hand, pretending to fuck around with equations. By the way, Y= -4.

7 W's in a Row For The Sox. Hannah Storm Is A Cutie.

NEW HAVEN, Conn. -- New York Yankees general manager Brian Cashman said Wednesday the team will monitor the number of home runs hit in its new stadium but cautioned it's too soon to make a judgment and suggested it was part of a wider phenomenon. Cashman, speaking at Southern Connecticut State University, said the sample is small because the season has just started. "It's something we're going to have to keep our eye on because clearly the numbers don't lie," Cashman said.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. They spend 1.5 billion bones and you completely ignore the wind patterns? I guess they don't teach home field advantage 101 over there at the Catholic University of America(yes I googled brian cashman and found his college). I think they row there. No, they crew. That's right. And what other phenomenon can it be? Maybe the pitching staff just sucks. How's that for a fucking brain buster. At least the other investments like CC are off to a booming start. Oh. Really? 7 runs yesterday, eh? It's cool, I just have one thing to say about this. Take it away Mr. Hall and that Oates playa...

Side Boob Of The Day

We like her and we like her too. Word on the street is Jessica Biel shows both cans in her new movie and even multiple booty shots.

Mike Cohen Just Texted Me Some Real Nice News

Former Duke point guard Greg Paulus will visit Syracuse this weekend and meet with coaches to explore the possibility of playing for the Orange football team, according to multiple internet reports. Paulus played quarterback for Christian Brothers Academy in Syracuse and was the 2005 Gatorade national high school football player of the year. He was offered football scholarships to Notre Dame and Miami (Fla.) before he chose to play basketball for the Blue Devils.

Let me say this. If Paulus does decide to become our QB then I will take back every terrible thing I have ever said about him, his mother, his faggot little brother, and dumb fucking father. Ok. Maybe not. Sure, I'll be pleased but he should have been at Syracuse ever since he was in high school. How do you turn down an offer to be the BMOC and the poster boy for returning that football program to glory a mere 6 years after a man named McNabb was at the helm? I guess 4 years of taking it in the ass from coach K over at Duke finally knocked some sense into this court slapping, awful defense playing, I lost my starting job as a senior, deep throating, plaid skirt wearing, Dick Vitale loving, asshole. I know, I was expecting a better finish to that one too. Whatever. I'll take him. Who is the starting QB for 'Cuse anyway? Seriously. I'll have to get back to you on that one. And to answer your question; Yes, I would have sex with Paula Abdul.

Lets Take It Back To '05

Fucking classic. There are just so many wrong statements in that rap. My tits are gravy, my belly button is made out of strawberry something but I'm nothing.



The funny thing is that this is exactly what Noj Adamski sounds like when he freestyles. You little beautiful duck.

Powe Tears ACL But B-Scals Cleared To Play. Yay?

Awesome. Motherfucking terrific. I'm so enthused. Which Chicago player will light our ass up tomorrow night? Maybe Joakim Noah will look like the next best thing again. I really hope Rondo has another break out game only to commit the dumbest foul ever on Derrick Rose like he did in in game 1. Yeah he did work alright. If by work you meant being a complete shit head. I'm just waiting for all the Boston fans who jumped on our back last year when we were crowned champs, to move on and become Bruins fans only to disappear until October and they suddenly show up wearing a Jacoby Ellsbury shirt because he's gorgeous. You'll ignore his piss poor stats as a true lead off man and praise him for God knows what. Maybe even throw on a Patriots shirt even though 2 years ago you were slapping your best friends hand when the G-men won the superbowl because it was a "great game." Fuck that. I hold that as the darkest week of my life. Ever. Your dog could have died and I'd tell you to fuck off then spit on your shoe. I don't know what the point of this post is anymore except that 47% of the fans that fill the Garden for every Celtics game don't deserve to be there and it fucks my day up. It pisses me off and now I'm sweating. Hopefully Scals can put on a performance like Blount did in '04. Who? Exactly. Go fuck yourself. Suck my balls. Everyone.

Side Boob Of The Day

Here is gone. I feel so much like giving up....

WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS?!?!

No words. Just listen and love it. www.jonesBIGASStruckrentalandstorage.com/jonesGOODASSbbqandfootmassage.html

Woman Charged Twice With DUI In 3 Hours.

FARMINGTON, Conn. -- A woman was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence twice within three hours, police said. Farmington police said Elsa Veisor was given a field sobriety test in a parking lot on Saturday. Police said Veisor was found to be driving under the influence and was taken to police department and charged .Police said officers told Veisor that a friend could pick up her car which was left in the parking lot.They said the friend who picked up the car also picked Veisor up from the police department. They said Veisor got behind the wheel of the car and on her way home, passed the officer who originally stopped.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Move that camera down 3 inches and we got today's side boob of the day. I like where your heads at. We can ignore the whole DUI thing and this chick is a solid 8. Throw in her piss poor judgment and she gets reduced to a 7. Don't get me wrong, I love the ladies and they rev my engine but they do not belong behind the wheel. And how about the friend here. At what point between the bitch's slurred speech, googly eyes, quirky smile and blood shot eyes did she say, "yeah, you drive. I'm so tired I feel like potentially dying." All on a Monday night. No excuses, you're not in college anymore. Then again, with decisions like those I'd be shocked if these two booze hags even made it to college.

C's, B's and Sox Win. So This is What Heaven Feels Like.

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Side Boob Of The Day

It's lonely where you are, come back down. and I wont tell em your name.

Smart Guy

Eric Devendorf Junior G Syracuse 6-4, 180
Status: Declared for draft. Will hire agent.
Scout’s comment: “I have no idea why he came out. I have no thoughts on Eric Devendorf. He’s not someone we even discuss.”

Bahahahaaa. At least he's a stand up individual right? Oh. Right. He spends his spare time physically abusing females. It's a dirty job but someone has to keep those chicks in line I guess. Cool tats dude.

He Loves The New Mets Stadium

Ovechkin Needs To Get Knocked The Fuck Out

NEW YORK -- The New York Rangers had an interested observer sitting on the visitors bench as they took the ice for their pregame skate Monday morning. Washington Capitals winger Alex Ovechkin was watching the Rangers' practice when a Rangers trainer complained to the Capitals. Washington PR man Nate Ewell then asked Ovechkin to leave the area. "Alex was just looking for a place to relax. He likes being by the ice," Ewell said. "As soon as he found out it made the Rangers uncomfortable, he left." When asked why the Rangers wanted him to leave, Ovechkin joked: "Because they're afraid of me."

Yeah? The Rangers are afraid of you? The fact that you've never escaped the 1st round of the playoffs, just lost 2 games at home, or the fact you haven't been able to find the back of net yet? I see all the room for fear now. Fucking euro-trash hockey players. They're all visor wear bitches who run around, play tough but never back anything up. Unless you're from Canada, get off the ice. Let the real men show you how it's done. You don't see Sean Avery sitting in on a practice session. Typical Russians. Which brings up another side. The Patriots and General Bill get called cheaters for the next 40 years but because the media loves this Ovechkin character, we just laugh it off. I sense a conflict of interest. Typical ESPN.

Side Boob Of The Day

The End Of An Era?

Lets hope not Sellberg. I can't keep myself and still keep you too. We're lookin for people who will fight for this job. Look how happy we once were and now this....

LETS GOOO!!!

Paul Simon in Africa?! I couldn't pass on this. Seriously.If the opening doesn't get you on your feet and dancing then you have no soul. Just look at the moves on Paul. I fucking love it.

I Said That I Don't Care, I Just Run My Hands Through Her Dark Hair then I Pray To God You Gotta Help Me Fly Away

TORRINGTON – Sean Goodno, 18, 16 Millbrook Lane, Harwinton, was arrested and charged with possessing an inaccurate operator’s license as proof of age, procuring liquor by persons forbidden and third-degree forgery after he attempted to purchase beer at a local package store with a fake identification card on 408 Church St. on April 16. Goodno was held on a $1,000 non-surety bond and is scheduled to appear in Bantam Superior Court on April 27.

Arrested for what? Bein awesome? This is fucking nonsense as far I'm concerned. The man can't wait to knock a brother down once we start to breath that fresh air of success.this is the type of tomfullery that makes me want to strip down naked and start the revolution(historical scholars noted that 1776 was the year of the lover after all). Listen, I don't know what 'procuring' means or what a non-surety bond is but there is one thing I do know. All this says is a hard working individual can't finish the hard working college week off with a ice cold brewski and it's criminal. You're saying Sean Goodnuts can go across the world, stab a gook, tortue an iraqi hooker, make love to his sworn enemy, defend his country, get his legs blown up in combat, vote for Barack, pack a duecski, get cancer, go to jail for life, become mayor, have a family, and be responsible for the advancement of mankind but he can't buy alcohol? Fuck yeah, America. You're so right on with this one too.

Side Boob Of The Day

I think it's ok to puke on this one. Even I'm not impressed.

I Miss You.

Tea Bag That Guy?

In Ventura, more than 1,000 people gathered under blue skies to vent wide-ranging concerns, from over-taxation and government spending to condemnation of a recent Homeland Security report tracking a rise in violence among right-wing groups. Holding signs such as "Abolish the Federal Reserve," and "We are Obummed Out, Stop Spending, No More Taxes," the crowd was in a celebratory mood, loudly applauding each speaker and cheering as a small plane droned overhead pulling a banner that said "I’m Tea’d Off!!" "I’d like to see an end to this out-of-control spending,’’ Hirsch said, as his wife nodded next to him. "Stimulate by cutting taxes, not increasing spending."

I gotta say I really don't give a shit what this is or do I even care to understand it. I couldn't shy away from using tea bag and stimulate numerous times in one post. Let's cut that excessive spending. Says the group of people who just spent money on numerous tea bags to wear on there heads as a sign of protest. Yeah, that makes sense. That Obama guy is such a tyrant. What a modern day Boston Tea Party. You guys really showed them who runs this country. I'm so sick of this taxation without representation too. Oh, wait. That's not the case. It's like everything Fox news used to hate, they now love? I don't know. I just hope everyone doesn't start tea bagging. Then we're all gonna be tea bagging each other. Or putting balls in peoples' mouth.

I Thought I Was OK. Then I Woke Up.

Boston Red Sox shortstop Jed Lowrie has traveled to Arizona to have his injured left wrist further examined, and the second-year veteran said there's a chance his season was over. "The last thing I want is surgery," Lowrie said Friday, according to the Boston Herald. "But if it's something that will make this better and be the long-term solution, I'll do it."

If one more player goes down with an injury I am calling Jack Bauer in for a state of emergency. This is fucking disgusting. It's not even small injuries anymore. It's all season ending shit. It's like my deepest and darkest fears are coming true. Nick Green or Julio Lugo at short all year? Ugh. I'm trying not vomit in my mouth. Nick Green is no youngster like our boy Jed. He's a 30 year old chump who has barely played 3 major league seasons. Like he's not too old for the earth but he's too old to be our starting short stop. And he just sucks. If I'm sitting down at the dinner table and he walks over to grab some grub with me, I'm standing up and excusing myself. Don't even put me and that dude in the same breath.

Man Gets The Noise Brought On Him

HARTFORD, Conn. -- A man is in fair condition after being beaten with a board in Hartford, police said.Police said there was a fight outside a 24-hour convenience store at the corner of Albany Avenue and Bedford Street Friday night.Hartford police said they believe the fight was between two people and that one was struck with a 2-by-4.

This might be worse than throwing a shoe in battle. I mean who uses a 2 by 4? Talk about bringing a knife to a gun fight. Not my fault some were playing chess while others were playing checkers. I don't necessarily condone the use of a wood board but I'm not gonna hound the guy for it. Talk about improvising here. If this was the NFL draft, I bet Mel Kiper would get in on this talk and even describe the guy as crafty. Maybe a little shifty. A modern day Brett Favre. Makes big decisions in big spots. In fact, I admire the little guy for pulling out all the stops. He kept his head on a swivel and that's exactly what you gotta do when you find yourself in a vicious cock fight.

Side Boob Of The Day

I was looking at David Beckham in the back. I don't know about anyone else

No. Now I'm Back.

Listennnnnn. It's been just dump fuck days the past week. First KG is done for the year and then the healthiest man in America, Danny Ainge has a heart attack. Jonny Flynn leaves Syracuse and kills our chance for a title next year. John Madden retires from football. And the Sox just suck. So I apologize for my lack of production. I mean I thought the other guys could come in and pick up the slack because that's what championship teams do. They grind and finish with positive results, no matter how fucking ugly it gets. Which leads me to my next point. This is a lengthy post so strap the fuck in. I got a lot to say.

The C's. We're in trouble. No doubt about that. KG is the heart and soul of this team and to say someone could even fill his shoes is absolutely criminal. And to those who say this is all a ploy by the C's front office to fool our opponents; you're fucking dumb. End of story. The guy is the definition of a warrior. And maybe he's just old and knees and old people don't mix well. But we can win this whole thang. I'm a big believer in love. And that's what this team has for each other. They pick each other up when some are down and light up the darkness when all but hope is gone. You've all just been Rondo'd.

That's 2 wins in a row for the sox kids. Here we fucking come. For the first time since I can remember, the bullpen is actually our strongest part of the team. Brad Penny was to put it kindly, troublesome tonight. But you expect that out of a guy who had injury problems a year ago and this early in the year, I'm OK with it. You know what really grinds my gears? David Ortiz. Like scary how much this guy scares me. You don't strikeout 3 fucking times then walk away with a smirk on your mug. You walk your ass into the batting cages and you get to fucking work. In these harsh economic times we can't be wasting our time on guys with just a reputation. It's a cut throat world and all about what have you done for me lately. We can talk about his knee or wrist or whatever papi loyalist's can conjure up. The bottom line is this. Maybe he just isn't that great of a hitter. And it fucking pains me to say such a thing. He's a guy who had probably the most feared right handed hitter in the game batting behind him and protecting him. Of course he was getting pitches to smack. But not anymore. Don't get me wrong, Youk is a good clean up guy but Manny was great. And that's what makes the difference between protecting a guy like Papi. Overall I like this Sox team. Jbaybaybay is huge(not physically). Dustin is MVP. Youk is yankin. Jacoby is ehhh just a pretty face. JD isn't hurt yet, Mike Lowell is trying to keep his job, Nick Green is who the fuck is nick green? 'Tek is 'Tek. You always know what you're gonna get from him and he'll even suprise ya once in a while. Like a loyal female. We're gonna get that mojo poppin real soon. Hopefully scrubs like Nick Green aren't around to enjoy it. I got nothing against him as a player. Think he plays stellar defense and he had a couple clutch hits this evening. This is more personal. I don't wanna get into it. Let's just say he doesn't use his right blinker in traffic and nothing pisses me off more than people switching lanes without a notification. Or when lanes merge and that one fuck head passes 3 cars when he should have been behind you. Usually a gaysian (gay asian) or a female. Where was I?

Sean Avery did his thing the other night. Tripped a guy, shoved his stick into the goalies chest, barked like a dog, just another day in the life. Bruins won too. Blah, blah, blah, blah. I feel so much like giving up.

I promise I'll stop with these extra long one post a day shit. I just needed to recover.

Side Boob Of The Day

Too much? Some would argue not enough.