Hipsters Build Own Church. I Just Barfed. But I'm Also Hungover So That Could Be It

For a budding church in Flushing, your Sunday best will be a flannel shirt and skinny jeans. The Rev. Gage Jung, 37, is building an artsy flock for a brand-new, nondenominational congregation called the Hipster Church. His eclectic group of followers embody the counterculture mission statement - "This ain't your mama's church." "We're not trying to make a church like the one your parents went to. We're trying to make a church for our generation," said Jung, a self-proclaimed hipster. Jung was ordained a minister 10 years ago. The former lead pastor at the United Generations Church in Brooklyn said Flushing is fertile ground for gathering a new flock. "We wanted to go to a place where there was the most amount of need," Jung said, pointing to a large number of homeless and nonbelievers in the area. Jung had his first monthly meeting at the Sheraton LaGuardia East Hotel in Flushing earlier this month. He has recruited 32 followers so far, he said, and his goal is to get 100 by September, when the church is scheduled to open. The group's 1-1/2-hour service features an indie rock band that plays its own religious songs. Instead of using Bibles in book form, congregants use a Bible app on iPhones, Jung said. The service even includes an informal mingling where participants listen to indie rockers like MGMT and Arcade Fire, and chat over donuts and candy.

Now I know what the rest of the world felt like when the Romans adopted Christianty and made the worship of other Gods illegal. Make no mistake, it's all fun and games until somebody builds you a church and the only thing worse than a hipster is one who has an entire butt fucking congregation to back up his or her claims. I mean I love a flannel shirt as much as the next guy but it's the whole hipster shtick that pisses me off. Is it that hard for you to give a fuck about anything? I know you come from a wealthy family. You pay $30,000 to go to some private school yet you dress like a homeless hereoine junkie named James. I don't get it.