Lindsay Lohan Released From Jail, Goes to Rehab

You may recall that Lindsay Lohan went to jail exactly 2 weeks ago to serve 90 days. Well she was released from jail Sunday at midnight after serving only 13 days. I will never understand how every celebrity who receives a few months in jail gets out after a few weeks. The judge obviously knew all along that Lindsay wouldn't serve the entire time so why not just make her sentence two weeks instead of 90 days. Would she have gotten out after like 3 days if that happened?


Lindsay has been bitching during this whole ordeal about how she is innocent even after she clearly broke a million laws. She even wanted time off in between when her jail time ended and when she had to report to rehab. She also wanted to hand-pick the rehab facility she would attend. TMZ reported that the rehab facility Lindsay picked out was spending over $200,000 on remodeling in preparation for her arrival. This is the rehab Lindsay wanted to go to. And frankly, who wouldn't want to go there, the website advertises that its patients get to do really cool shit. It says...

"The Newport Beach peninsula, where our facilities are located, has nine miles of sandy beaches and endless opportunities for those looking to surf, sun, body-board, sail, snorkel or just enjoy the terrific year-round weather on the shores of one of California’s most picturesque playgrounds. Newport Beach and the surrounding areas boast museums, world-class shopping malls, restaurants, golf courses, theme parks (including Disneyland, and California Adventure), and the famous Orange County Performing Arts Center."

A last minute change sent Lindsay to a UCLA rehab and deprived her of surfing, shopping and going to Disneyland for the next 90 days. I'm strongly considering developing an addiction so I can take a vacation for 3 months.


Lindsay planned a big exit from jail that included calling in her famous hairstylist to make her look good on the 30 second walk from the jail door to her car. Well the people at the jail foiled that plan. As tons of media were camped outside the front doors and Lindsay was getting ready to make her grand exit, she was taken to a back door and immediately put into a waiting SUV. Instead of getting time off like the spoiled bitch wanted, she was taken straight to rehab where she will spend the next 90 days. Unlike jail, Lindsay has to spend the entire sentence time in rehab and can't get out early.

People commented that Lindsay is "very upset" that she wasn't allowed to see her family before going to rehab. The article also says...

"Lohan, the source adds, is feeling depressed.' '[She] is having a difficult time accepting that she will be in rehab for the next three months,' the source says. 'She still doesn't think that she needs any help.'"

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. In honor of Lindsay's rehab and constant bitching: