OK. I'm Slowly Talking Myself Into The Shaq Signing.

'It is not every day that you can add a player of Shaquille's caliber to your team,' said Celtics president Danny Ainge in a statement. 'His past experience speaks for itself and we believe that he is a great fit for our roster, so we're very excited that he is joining the Celtics family. Some have questioned his effectiveness, but last year Shaquille was still one of the league's better defensive rebounders. This will address a weakness of ours during last year's regular season. In addition to rebounding, Shaq brings post scoring, toughness, and a winning spirit. I remember in 1985, we signed Bill Walton, and his addition put us over the top. We feel that with the addition of Shaq, we'll have one of the best front lines in the league, and, when Kendrick Perkins returns, the deepest. Shaq has made it clear that he would do whatever it takes to help the team raise Banner 18, and we look forward to working towards that goal together.''

At first I hated this because I hate Shaq but then I remembered the oldest rule in the book. Fans hate other players because they don't play for their favorite team, right? Wrong. I hate Lebron because his ego is too big for the universe and he's one of the biggest frauds in the professional sports since A-roid. And I always hated Shaq because I thought he was an idiot for the past 4 years who thought he was still in his 2002 form. Then I started thinking. What if he doesn't think of himself as a star player anymore? What if he's fine with being the 2nd option at center until Perk is back and then he becomes the 3rd option? He must know that's the case. You don't throw $2.1 million at a dude and tell him to go lead your squad. That's peasant money. That's "We'll throw you in to rough up Howard and Bynum" type money. So I'm fine with Shaq being our enforcer as long he doesn't act like a complete moron. No stupid nicknames,  no ego trips in the locker room. Just be KG's bitch for the next 9 months, stay out of Rondo's way and we'll get along just fine. He's gotta be an upgrade from Shelden Williams. I think. I hope.