Weekly Jersey Shore Recap

It was tough to live up to last week's billing. I can't tell you how excited I am for next week though when Snickers/snookers gets popped by some jackass. This must be what Theo Epstein meant when he said this is gonna be a bridge year because this was a bridge episode for sure. If I had to give last night a score, I'll go with a 6. It's clear the recipe for success is 40 minutes of The Situation, Snooki, side comments from Pauly D and wild dancing from Ronnie. I don't really wanna hear Ronnie and Sammi talk about their love. It makes me sick. Just imagine a show of just The Situation and Snooki trying to top each other with one liners and bold actions. How 'bout that hottub scene? Pretty, pretty, pretty funny. As usual, I'm gonna go through some bullet points.

-Angelina left the show after breaking up with her boyfriend. But he's going through a divorce. So he might be her boyfriend but he's also some other chicks husband. Awkward thanksgiving conversation.

-JWoww likes Ronnie. I mean liiiikes Ronnie.

-"Jwoww is playin it off like she didn't really kiss me. She doesn't wanna feel like a trash bag because she has a boyfriend and she kissed me with her tounge."- Weekly quote from Pauly D ladies and gents. Followed by "Jwoww breakin up with her boyfriend just means she'll feel less guilty when she hooks up with me."

-Count how many times the word "situation" is said. That's how much I love all of you.

-Snooks. Hilarious. I honestly laugh whenever I think about her. Pickles is her thing.

-I know last week I said I hated the situation but he's the man. He's a guys guy. He has so many smart ass comments that nobody picks up on.

-This is the 2nd week in a row that Snooki bumped into some guy at the club that she calls her "friend" and ends up bringing them back to the crib. It's becoming clear that she'll fuck anyone who would fuck her.

-Vinny and Pauly D are gonna be those guys on MTV shows who are never involved in any story line but can always be found lurking in the back with some off color comment. It's the reason why people like Desi are always invited on an outing with me. Nobody has a problem with them. It's fantastic.

-Oh, Yeah. Pauly almost blew the house up by pouring charcoal into a gas grill. Once again, Pauly D, Ladies and gents.

-nice hat, ron.

-Snooki likes a good guy and a jerk off. Holla!