Dez Bryant Owes a Jewelry Store Over $267k

Jesus, athletes love to just blow money away. Earlier in the week Billy Blog wrote about Pretty Boy Floyd Mayweather winning over $37,000 during the Bulls game. Well unless you're as dumb as Rain Man, you know he doesn't post about the bets he loses. And trust me, he loses a lot.

Now apparently Cowboys' wide receiver Dez Bryant, who was earlier kicked out of a mall for sagging his pants, owes a jewelry store $267k. How the fuck do you owe someone $267k? I can't even spell that much money (hint why I'm only writing $267k).


See the problem here is Dez didn't go to Jacob the Jeweler like all the other badasses in the industry do. Whenever I need to get some new "ice" and "bling up" with the mad "bitches" in my "hood", I just call the Jeweler and he sends me one. It's one of the benefits here at Ugg Boots.

Clearly Dez needs to start hanging out with Lindsay Blowhan, a regular customer in court for stealing jewelry. I'm sure the two of them would love to hang out all day and talk about how hard their lives are and how everybody is out to get them. Then I would walk by and roundhouse kick Blowhan before Stonecold Stunning Dez. Cause that's what I do. If Dez really wants to be "hood" he should keep following in Lindsay's footsteps and drop his last name. From now on his name is just "Dez" and nothing more.