George Clooney Broke Up with Elisabetta Canalis

George Clooney and Italian model Elisabetta Canalis broke up after dating for over a year. And dating for over a year in Hollywood is like 14 years in the real world so they were pretty much married. Except George Clooney is the bro of all bros and doesn't do that shit. He just dates supermodels, buys them islands, bangs them then moves on to something younger and hotter and repeat. Yes, that's the island he bought for Canalis above.

Popeater - "We are not together anymore. It's very difficult and very personal, and we hope everyone can respect our privacy," the ex-pair said in a joint statement released on Wednesday.

We can't say we didn't see this coming. The Italian actress and model, 32, recently told an Italian magazine that she had no plans to live the bachelorette life forever and knew that she wanted to be married at some point -- a revelation that most likely sent Clooney, 50, who has vowed to never marry again, running.

The man is just smart. Why get married when you're 50 and have to settle down with one person and then probably give her half your shit when you divorce when all you want to do is run through sillies 20+ years younger than you? And the whole "buying her an island thing"? That's genius too. Let her stay on a remote island and come visit her when you want. It's sort of like a modern day version of Rapunzel.