Slut.

Hayden Panettiere and rumored new beau Scotty McKnight stop by Mel’s Diner for a bite to eat on Thursday (June 16) in West Hollywood, Calif. The 21-year-old actress has reportedly been seeing Scotty, a wide receiver for the New York Jets. She was mistakenly linked to Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez earlier this month. “I’m a huge Jets fan and became very good friends with Mark and his buddies,” Hayden previously told Us Weekly.

I knew I couldn't compete with the Heavyweight Champ in Wladimir and I knew I couldn't hold a candle to the Sanchize because he's a stud but who the fuck is Scott McKnight? 7th round draft pick? He plays for the Jets? Looks like a very poor man's Wes Welker. That's even too much of a compliment. He's a very, very poor man's Julian Edelman. Fuck this. Fuck you. I have too much charisma to throw away on one little bitch who's vagina probably looks like Suez Canal. That means you can fit a pretty good sized ship through it.



P.S. Dudes who wear those hats are trying way too hard. It's June, bro. It aint fucking winter in Aspen.