Ummmm Heather Is In CT Tonight and Nobody Told Me?

McDonalds breakfast? That's my shit. Cigarettes are gross? Check. Be the cutest bitch you'll ever meet? That she is. I don't know what the fuck Elevate is and I don't really care. What I do know is The B's just won the Stanley Cup, my hair is killing it today and Heather has crossed into my state lines. If that's not a sign from the sex gods then I'm not sure what is anymore. I might even be able to hit her with a line about coming into my jurisdiction. Except I'd emphasize the spelling on "cumming" and "jurisdicktion" like that. I just made that up. Tell me I'm not the best blogger this side of this Mississippi.