Porn Industry Is Shut Down! Porn Industry Is Shut Down!

The multibillion-dollar porn industry located in the San Fernando valley of southern California has been thrown into crisis after one of its performers tested positive for HIV. The discovery was made at the Adult Industry Medical Healthcare Foundation, AIM, a clinic that carries out mandatory testing for about 1,200 porn actors in the valley every month. The clinic has refused to reveal the gender of the performer or which studio he or she worked for, but it has started to track down all other actors known to have been exposed and is now quarantining them until they can also be tested. Two major studios have temporarily suspended filming, Vivid Entertainment, which is probably the largest porn-production company in the world, and Wicked Pictures. The anonymous performer is the first to have tested positive for HIV in over a year. The last major panic to grip the valley was in 2004 when a male star, Darren James, was found to have contracted the virus, probably from a filming session in Brazil. He in turn infected three actresses. More than 30 studios shut down temporarily while tests on many other performers who had engaged in filming with the four infected individuals were tested. The new positive test result has thrown up the long-debated issue about condoms in the porn industry. In the wake of the 2004 scare condom use became prevalent in the valley, but gradually filming without protection returned to being the norm as studios argued that the use of condoms was driving down sales.

HIV? Really? That's what it takes to shut down the porn industry? Hasn't shut down Magic Johnson but the porn industry is put on a hold because an actor or actress contracted the disease that I thought everybody had. It's gotta be a guy because only the gays get HIV, right? Gays and monkeys, I think. No? That's what I was always told. Now listen, I'm not gonna sit here and act innocent and shit and pretend like porn is some gross industry that should be forbidden in every country because that's not my belief. Porn could have saved Coach Neil's career but instead he wanted to get his kicks some other way so he climbed up on that stool and kissed Nascar goodbye. I didn't even know there was a region of California that was designated as porn city. It's kind of gross to think about what kind of diseases are floating around but also kind of cool. Like what if the NBA had their own little spot on the map? Kevin Garnet wakes up every morning and has a beer with Karl Malone like they were childhood buddies then they all play pickup ball together. That's kinda what happens in this vagina valley except dixie enormous wakes up, goes down on dirk diggler and gets a little AIDS. I guess it's pretty much what the cast of Jersey Shore goes through on a daily basis.


P.S. What's the over/under on amount of days it takes someone to write a porno involving trapped miners in chili?