Florida Marlins shortstop Hanley Ramirez(notes) hasn't played for the Boston Red Sox since 2005 when he had two at-bats over two games. the team apparently wants the All-Star back now, according to the New York Daily News. Boston let shortstop Alex Gonzalez go and isn't ready to depend on Jed Lowrie(notes) as a full-time infielder just yet so the team is trying to wrest Ramirez from his current place of employment. It must've burned Boston up when Ramirez won Rookie of the Year in 2006 with the Marlins although the Red Sox got Josh Beckett(notes),Mike Lowell(notes), and Guillermo Mota(notes) in the transaction. Not too shabby a group. Wonder if the folks in Boston will enjoy Ramirez's habit of sticking pies in teammates' faces after big wins as much as the folks in Florida do.
Do people actually get paid for writing articles like this? The sox don't have a shortstop so let's just make up a rumor that makes sense because he's a player that they once traded for Beckett, Lowell and a 2007 World Series title. That's what gets lost in that whole Ramirez/Beckett trade. Yeah, we lost a great player but we also got another future hall of famer and fucking championship. I'll take that over a rookie of the year award. Can we just forget about him? I mean, we hooked up with a chick who was a 7 in high school but now that she hit her stride in her college, she's a perfect 10 and we try to get it back. Just get over it. That ship has sailed. Having said that, if we can pull off a deal for Hanley then you won't see this guy complaining. He's pretty terrific. Emphasis on the pretty.
The Saints are 10-0. Big fucking deal. For some reason I have no worries about this game. There isn't any doubt in my mind that Tom Terrific and the boys are going to come into the Superdome, get super dome and take of business the New England way. What's the New England way? We burn your village, rape your women and kill your leaders. We didn't obtain the 13 original colonies by handing out praise to those who didn't earn it. We're still the model for what all NFL teams strive to be. The Dynasty. Final score: 670-10.
Yes, he jumped a guy from behind. You might say it was like Jimmy Clausen getting coldcocked outside of Ruby Tuesdays but don't you dare call Sean Avery a pussy for always challenging guys who don't fight. Obviously he's not going go to at it with another team's enforcer. That's just stupid. He's 5 foot 9 and doesn't stand a chance. What Sean Avery does it brilliant. He gets inside the heads of skill guys and takes people like Sidney Crosby off their game in hopes that they'll retaliate and draw a penalty. The bottom line is if Avery fights someone, they're both going in the drunk tank for 5. The Rangers can do without him but the other team suffers if they lose one of their skill guys from a line.
Because I fucking writhe in pain. First, Tiger Woods. And I don't really care about his minor car crash. It's the the reason behind the crash which really fucks my day up. He was the last great action hero and here he is going out and cheating on his swedish model of a wife. Lost a little respect in my eyes, that's all. I mean Phil Mickelson doesn't cheat on his wife and she's got the cancer.
2) I haven't come up with a quality post in a solid week and it's flat out embarrassing. I'm at the point where I want people to laugh as they see me coming and then I want them to weep as I walk away. That's just one of my dreams. At the rate I'm going, we'll never get there.
3) This one might sting the most. It has me more angered than anything. Sellberg is going to claim that he beat me up and made me bleed. Well listen chachi, where I come from there are 12 rounds to a high stakes boxing match. You might have taken the first 2 because of the wet hill and terrible lighting and the 30 pound advantage(which he didn't have before freshman year) but I promise you this, you haven't heard the last of this guy. Whether it's on the ice or in the ring, I'm gonna come back running into your heart with the zeal of a thousand warriors. Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose.
4) What's the deal with Vince Young? Everyone wants to call him great again or some bullshit and the only thing I can't get over is what if he killed himself last year. Wasn't he on suicide watch or something?And he didn't finish the job. So in other words, he's a failure.
5) My fantasy football team hit the skids this week. The MartyMcFlys had a solid 5 week run going and I don't know what happened. Victory obviously got to our heads. Started looking too far ahead to the playoffs and lost sight of the next game. And maybe it's my fault. I think I rode Sidney Rice a little too long and forgot about my man Desean Jackson. Even Percy played well. I think my bench points could beat 75% of the league.
6) Fuck thanksgiving break. Seriously. Let's give everyone a taste of winter break but then make them go back to school for 3 more weeks and take finals.
7) This post has gotten too personal. Can't let anybody into my heart. That's rule #1.
JACKSON, Mich. -- Jackson police are working to crack a case of fowl play. They're searching for a man who broke into an apartment about 11 p.m. Tuesday and stole a family's holiday turkey.Police Lt. Christopher Simpson told the Jackson Citizen Patriot the man ran into the kitchen and stole the turkey out of the freezer. He said the 6-foot, 300-pound bald man "fled with turkey in hand." Police said a woman and two children were home at the time, and no one was injured.
Uhhhhh. Yes. I love this story for so many reasons. First, I thin no matter what the circumstance is, 6 foot, 300-pound bald men are absolutely hilarious. Just the vision of them. An instant punch line in my opinion just like when you're conversing about any subject and someone says Dan Donahue and it brings a chuckle from the crowd. But let's face facts. You gotta give the man his props for fleeing with the turkey in hand. I mean it's not like you're carrying the pigskin across the 5 yard line here. I need Green Bay to sign this drunk asshole to a contract to protect my fantasy QB, Aaron Rodgers.
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Notre Dame quarterback Jimmy Clausen was punched in the face by an irate fan outside a South Bend restaurant early Sunday morning and has a swollen eye, a person briefed on the incident said on Monday. That person said Clausen was "sucker-punched" by a fan as he left an establishment after having dinner with his parents. The fan allegedly said something to Clausen and/or a female acquaintance. A South Bend police spokesman said that no police reports were filed over the weekend involving Clausen, according to the Chicago Tribune. The newspaper also reported that the name of the bar was CJ's and that a bartender at the establishment said that Clausen had been there with family members and other Irish upperclassmen after Notre Dame's loss to Connecticut on Senior Day.
I root Notre Dame and I really like Jimmy Clausen. But you can't lose to UConn. You just can't. That's not fucking acceptable. Especially when you lost to Syracuse at home a year ago. Now I'm not a huge fan of the sucker punch but usually that type of shit comes screaming out for a reason. Dan Donahue pulls a chair out from me so I obviously retaliate by throwing 2 haymakers at his ear. I'm sure this kid said something to Clausen and then Clausen responded with something about him being a loser and how he's gonna go home and start collecting checks from the St. Louis Rams. The part that really bugs me is that Clausen was with his lady and the parents. It just seems there is an unwritten rule that you can't attack a fellow man when he is in the company of the woman who birthed him or the lass who will push out Jimmy Clausen jr some day. With that being said(curb your enthusiasm finale), if I see the Manning brothers out with the family then all hell is going to break lose.
"The biggest thing was coming back from a two goal deficit. I think regardless of what the score was, coming back and winning a game after you're losing 2-0 is big for a team that has been struggling. I hope it puts everybody around here in a good mood and the guys can go to Florida just feeling good and be able to not clench the stick as hard and just make some plays."
For anyone who still believes that the pest has lost his edge, let this be all the proof you need. 18 minutes of ice time, 2 goals and 5 hits. I wanna throw in that Parenteau and Anisimov each put up 3 points last night as well. The Hartford Wolfpack was fucking alive and well in NYC, baby.
Monday, November 23, 2009
SEATTLE -- A young woman in the first row behind the far corner flag was savoring prime views of the world's most recognizable player. The T-shirt she wore to the MLS Cup on Sunday night had a simple message in black and white: "Beckham Bend It Here." David Beckham promised he will be indeed be back in MLS next season -- and that he will eventually exercise his option to own one of the league's teams. "Of course," he said of returning in 2010, after his limped through the Los Angeles Galaxy's upset loss to Real Salt Lake in the league's championship match. "I've said I'll be back, and I will."
This is what gets lost in the "Beckham is a selfish player who loves the spotlight" discussion. He flat out loves to play the game and is constantly challenging himself to play at a high level. His critics want to paint a picture of a guy who is so obsessed with his image and lacks what it takes to lead grown men but I just don't see it. And I'm not just saying this because he's a favorite of mine. You watch a MLS game and it's clear as day how good he is compared to every player around him. The little things he does really makes everyone around him better. Last time I checked that was the defining factor of a great leader. Someone who shines but makes everyone else around him shine that much brighter. So why should anyone be pissed he's going to play for AC Milan next year? He knows he has to play at the top level to be prepared for the World Cup. I hope he never comes back to the MLS. Hanging around those scrubs is a fucking waste of his time as far I'm concerned.
Were people really questioning our coach? It's like OK, Jets, we'll let you talk shit about Randy Moss all week and let you forget about our best player named Wes Welker. And where did all the Jet fans go? I thought Mark Sanchez was supposed to be the next Joe Namath or something and Rex Ryan was the messiah. Well what the fuck happened? With the Cincy lost yesterday it looks like we're back in the drivers seat to take the #2 seed in playoffs. 4th and 2 is a distant memory.
P.S. I don't fucking know why the pictures won't load today so just imagine it being 2 big brass balls with Belichick smiling in the back.
The baddest left wing in the game baby. The Sean Avery before Sean Avery. Starting fights or scoring goals, Ted Lindsay always played to win. I hope people say that about me and HBMHL playing days sometime down the road. Just watch the video. He's fucking awesome.
DURANGO, Colo. -- A person in a chicken costume ruffled the feathers of Durango's city council as its members discussed rules for backyard fowl. At a council meeting Tuesday, someone in a chicken costume quietly entered the council chambers just as the mayor was discussing a recently-passed backyard hen ordinance. The costumed chicken took a few turns, flapped its arms, then took a seat in the nearly empty gallery. Several minutes later, the big bird left -- without identifying itself -- after laying an egg on the floor.
I've been saying the same shit for years. If you're going to go with the shock and awe approach then you better bring the rain as well as the thunder and that's exactly what this broseph pulled off. I mean yeah, he walked in quietly but after that the real show began with the flapping and the turning and the ass gyrating. I bet he had that audience fucking captivated just waiting for the grand finale and then it happened. The egg was layed. Game, set, match. If that doesn't send a message to city council then I don't know what will. No taxation without representation, bitch.
NEW YORK -- To better understand what it's like to play in Madison Square Garden, Wesley Johnson went to the perfect source. He asked Gerry McNamara for a little insight. The same McNamara who turned the famed arena into a Scranton high school pep rally during the Orange's unforgettable sprint to a 2006 Big East tournament title. Now a graduate assistant on the Syracuse bench, McNamara offered simple advice. "He told me, 'When the lights go up, you'll know it,'" Johnson said. And now everyone else will know Johnson. The Syracuse junior lived a dream as old as the city itself: the unknown talent stepping into the Big Apple spotlight and becoming an overnight sensation. Johnson scored 25 points and tacked on eight rebounds, carrying Syracuse to an 87-71 win over No. 4 North Carolina that was as stunning as it was dominant. Rumors of the Orange's demise after losing three guys to the NBA early are apparently greatly exaggerated, as was the hand-wringing over the loss to Division II Le Moyne in a preseason game.
When the lights go up, you'll know it. Leave it to Gerry Mcnamara to come up with one of the top 10 greatest quotes of all time. This team just looks scary and I'm not saying that because I'm a life long fan. The 2-3 zone has never looked so long and athletic. That's really all that matters on a Jimmy B coached squad.
Thierry Henry has conceded that Republic of Ireland "definitely deserve" to qualify for the World Cup finals and has backed calls for a replay, even though FIFA have already ruled out such a scenario. France captain Henry has been at the centre of real controversy after he handled the ball in extra time before passing for William Gallas to score in Wednesday night's World Cup play-off between the two countries. That goal ensured Les Bleus won 2-1 on aggregate to qualify for the finals in South Africa
Well this sucks. I had a post ready to be fired off the other day about it this game and it wasn't pretty. Everyone was asking me how I felt about my beloved Irish getting absolutely fucked in the ass by the French. And it's a common known fact that i don't like French people. I don't like the country, I don't like it's citizens, I don't like the government leaders and I haaaate the soccer team. France, Italy and Germany are actually on my list of countries I would annex from the globe when I become world dictator and appoint my man George W. as 2nd in command. But I couldn't post the other shit I had about that game because I think I'd be tried for war crimes. It was that bad. Then Henry comes out with this statement and it can be summed up in one word. Class. He's a classy motherfucker. He's a pussy just like the rest of his countrymen but he's also fair. If the guy who cheated says he cheated and wants to replay the game then why not just do it? Chalk it up to society trying to hold the irish boys down once again. That's why they shot JFK.
Tortorella wants the Rangers to grind, but the head coach simply doesn't have enough grinders in his lineup. Last night, though, featured the return of Sean Avery to the grinding persona that had been missing for much of the early season. Avery consistently went to the net, battled in the corners, took hits to protect the puck, threw hits on the forecheck and engaged the Caps at essentially every whistle of the Blueshirts' 4-2 defeat. He played on the edge and he played with an attitude. Avery, who took one penalty himself, drew a roughing penalty on John Erskine early in third after referees Dan Marouelli and Dean Morton had given the Washington defenseman a handful of get out of jail free cards for obvious prior fouls he committed against No. 16. "The last two games, Sean has been better," said Tortorella, who is habitually sparing in his praise of Avery, but did give the winger 16:03 of ice, including 3:03 of PP time. "He was instrumental on our power-play goal."
Remember, Boudreau coached Avery when both were in the AHL with Manchester so he comes by his feelings the hard way. Avery must have grabbed a copy of Boudreau's book, though, because he spent much of warmups prior to Tuesday's game at Madison Square Garden lobbing verbal bombs at Boudreau again. "I didn't even know he was doing it until I looked over and I said to [assistant coach] Bob Woods 'Is he talking to me?' [Avery] just stayed at the redline and talked and talked. Didn't even take warmups. I never responded or even looked at him. But he took himself out of the game."
Yes, those are two seperate articles illustrating the madness that is Sean Avery. I watched the game last night and I would have to concurr with what Torts(that's the coach, not like tort crime but good retention from the previous post) said. The best part is he didn't even take warmups and still had one of the best games of this young season. We're a different breed, I suppose. Just when you're ready to count us out, we come back throwing 7 different kinds of smoke.
Tell me this wasn't the ultimate panty dropper theme song. Giving those stares from across the pong table .Making that high five in flip cup last a couple seconds longer than the others. Why make our lives harder by fighting love tonight?
I think I just gave Steve Caruso his go-to vag pounding move for the next 4 years.
BEREA, Ohio -- If LeBron James truly believes he can help the Cleveland Browns, coach Eric Mangini has an orange helmet waiting for him. "I think he should come on down," Mangini said. The NBA superstar, who was an all-state wide receiver in high school, said Tuesday night that if he put the time and commitment into it, he could be a good football player. "If I put all my time and commitment into it, if I dedicated myself to the game of football, I could be really good," he said Tuesday night, "no matter what team I was on." Mangini agreed, calling James "a freak athletically," and said the 6-foot-8, 250-pounder could be dangerous at tight end, wide receiver or even outside linebacker. Quarterback Brady Quinn also heard about James' football fetish. He would love to have a target like James to throw to in the red zone. "That'd be great," Quinn said. "Tell him to suit up and let us know, we'll get him working. Obviously he's an incredibly talented athlete. If he wants to try to play a little bit now, we'd be more than willing to pick him up." Browns nose tackle Shaun Rogers isn't convinced James, as great as he is, could step into the NFL and be able to handle the pounding. "I heard that comment," Rogers said. "I have mixed emotions about that. A great athlete? Yes. A football player? No." Rogers then looked into TV cameras. "Yeah LeBron, I said it," he said. "It's a punishing game. I just don't think you can step off the basketball court after not going through this year in and year out and just play football. From that standpoint, I just don't think it's possible. You have to weather and condition your body to take this punishment."
Hate Mangini, hate Lebron, and I think Brady Quinn is a pussy. Does Lebron really think he has the world by the balls? This is the reason why I get pissed off when people say how mature he is and how financially intelligent he has become. He isn't. At all. He's a 24 year old gifted kid who had the fucking world handed to him on a platter and he thinks he's superman because of it. He thinks just because he can run and jump out of the gym with his 250 pound frame that he's going to take the NFL for a ride but he would break every bone in his body. Then they say he was the best player on his high school football team so it's possible. Really? Jbed was the best player on my soccer team and he's a cook at T.G.I. Fridays in South Carolina. And they call him Dan Donkey Dong Donahue for a reason but he's not the next Ron Jeremy. So it's good to see logic at work over there at ESPN. I'd still marry the shit out of Michelle Beadle though. She's adorable.
Over in L.A., Heidi is meeting with her therapist, Jordana Mansbacher, to talk about Spencer refusing to have kids. Dr. Mansbacher tells Heidi they should have gotten on the same page before getting married. When Dr. Mansbacher advises Heidi to wait on having babies, Heidi says she wants to stop taking birth control and surprise Spencer with a pregnancy. The therapist advises against this, saying Spencer might feel tricked.
Huh? What? I didn't quite get that. What the fuck?! This bitch can't be serious can she? I don't know how many people still watch The Hills but it really is the only show that keeps me angry enough to continue hating the entire world. I mean this in all honesty, every fucking person on that show should be publicly executed. And I don't mean that type of soft core porn lethal injection type execution either. I say we take them back to the old school, Nazareth style and stone these assclowns. And Kristen is supposed to be "the new girl in town." So why the fuck is her roommate the bartender from last season? They really couldn't find another fake actress with limited talent to play a bitch snot nosed cunt of a roommate? But now I'm off point and I'm sweating and I'm pissed off. It should be illegal to go off birth control and not tell someone. You're just putting the life of a future child in jeopardy. I feel like you could sue for a personal wrong there. Or a tort as they say in business law 204. Remind me to bring up birth control and irresponsible sluts in the next class discussion. P.S. The crack whore look is totally working for me. Keep up the good work.
NEW YORK — Brendan Shanahan is retiring from the NHL after 21 seasons and an almost certain Hall of Fame career. The 40-year-old forward announced Tuesday that he wouldn't play again. After going through training camp with the New Jersey Devils, the team he spent his final season with, he and the club mutually parted unexpectedly shortly before opening night of the season. "I would like to thank my family and all of the friends who have helped me achieve and maintain my childhood dream of playing in the National Hockey League," Shanahan said in a statement released by the NHL. "While I always dreamed of playing in the NHL, I can't honestly say that I would have ever imagined that I'd be this fortunate and blessed. I would like to sincerely thank everyone who has helped me fulfill this dream."Shanahan, who scored 656 career goals, decided to leave the Devils in October one day after he was told there was no spot for him on New Jersey's top three lines."He’s the best," said Sean Avery, good friends with Shanahan since their days together in Detroit.
Former Kansas City Chiefs running back Larry Johnson signed a one-year contract with the Cincinnati Bengals on Tuesday morning, a source told ESPN.com's John Clayton. Terms of the deal were not available. Johnson flew to Cincinnati on Monday to meet with the Bengals. Coach Marvin Lewis has told Johnson, who was released last week by the Chiefs, that he would be fourth on the team's depth chart at running back.
There is something about the Bengals that I just like. They're like the misfit toys from Rudolph or something. I'm not hopping on the band wagon or anything but I'm slowly starting to root for them. Carson Palmer is a great guy. I fell in love with him during HBO's Hard Knocks. Chad Ochocinco is on my fantasy football team and Cedric Benson carried me last year in the last 4 games of the season so I owe it to them to at least give a fuck. And I've always had a thing for Larry Johnson. He came into the league and ran angry. But then he started beating up women, wearing camo pants with hats that don't fit and calling reporters "fags." Sooooo that was weird.
Past 16 hours were a blur. or blurr. or blerr. Gotta clear my head. And scotty boucher jizzes in his pants whenever I make a post like this
1) The Pats are 6-3. Celtics lost 2 in a row. Sean Avery hasn't put a point up or gotten in a fight in like 4 weeks. What the fuck am I even living for?
2) Mikey O asked for open ice checks to be allowed in hbmhl this year. That's what I'm living for.
3) The Amazing Race. Is that a show about white people? It should be.
4) With a little love and some tenderness, we'll walk upon the water, we'll rise above the mess. Get 'em Hootie.
5) Watched Paranormal Activity like 4 days ago and I slept like a baby that night. Watched the game last night and I haven't slept yet.
6) Why isn't Marty Mcfly a bigger pop culture icon? The guy fucking time traveled in a Delorean, gave a rousing performance at the enchantment under the sea and saved Doc Brown's life. I put him up there with Thomas Jefferson as far as changing society goes. The thing with his mom wanting to jump his bones though really creeped me the fuck out. And whatever happened to Marvin Berry? The guy had rock n roll fall right into his lap and he gets no credit. I wish I could just write a whole book on Back to the Future and its absolutely classic scenes. It brought Huey Lewis and The News to fame. "Wait a minute Doc, are you telling me it's actually 8:25? Damn! I'm late for school!" I'm done.
7) Do you get pissed off when you see gay dudes comment on chick's status' on facebook? I just wanna type "homo." But gay dudes are so clever, I'm kind of afraid of the insults they'd toss back at me. Hopefully not my salad. Heyoooooo
8) That last one just made me laugh out loud to myself.
9) Sellberg's hair looks good. No punch line needed.
10) I don't like this Levi Johnston kid. I hate Sarah Palin but he knocked up her daughter and knows how to talk shit so he gets to be in Playgirl. Make sense. Who reads Playgirl? Is it just pictures of a dude's dongs?" And no way they have quiality articles with a bunch of bitches running the joint.
11) I cited lyrics from Forever Young in a paper. Someone stop me from being awesome. And not the Jay-z version. Or Rod Stewart. Or Bob Dylan.
12) I think Stephen Coletti should go on The Hills. He would slay bitches and make Justin-Bobby-Timothy-Yani look like a fool. That kid terrorized vagina's in Laguna. Maybe a cameo by that Talon D-bag and have him get hit by a car.
13) Pretty excited for my 500th friend on Facebook. I've already ignored like 8 people because I'm hoping it's Hayden or Tara Reid circa 2001.
14) I haaaaaate asian drivers. That felt so good to get off my chest.
15) Ravens vs. Browns might be the worst monday night football match up ever. Who the fuck schedules that shit? ESPN, awesome work.
16) Speaking of ESPN, who hired Trent Dilfer? I think he wants to blow every QB in the league. He just sucks. I get pissed off thinking about him and his faggy face.
17) Who hired Ron Packard?
18) I also hate Verizon and for no apparent reason except for the fact that I have AT&Tits(sounds like a venereal disease). Gotta support my side I suppose.
19) Manny Pacquiao is awesome.
20) My name is Ram and my tank is full. Really? Some dude came up with that shit and got paid millions for it? I bet they went to a retard hospital and just started taking down quotes when they had to go potty.
21) I wanna like John Mayer. I really do. He seems like a cool guy and someone I can have a beer with. He just tries so hard to be cool. No one says you can't get stoned, asshole. But now that you made a song about it someone probably will. Matty Berman doesn't ask questions and that's why we like him.
22) The Beatles were overrated. I went there.
23) Oh Sorry. I forgot Lebron retired that number for everybody. Fuck him. Seriously. Fuck him.
Honestly. Everyone wants to talk about how stupid the Patriots are for going for it on 4th and change. But why? They crack jokes like "oh man, I wouldn't even go for that in Madden." That's because you're a vagina. And that's also the reason you're life can be summed up in one word. Loser. Listen, I loved the 4th down call when they went for it and I love it 10 hours later. It was the perfect way to put the dagger in the hearts of Indy. That call wasn't going to define the game or not. I think the irresponsible use of the timeouts is what killed the game but I don't think Bill goes for it on 4th down if he knows he has 2 timeouts. Whatever. No matter what they did, punt or pass, Indy was going to get the ball back and score. There's just no doubt about it. Our defense couldn't even stop Joseph Addai if we wanted to last night and he's pathetic. So the way Bill saw it was we can punt it and let them score on us the hard way and leave no time on the clock or we can get the first down and end this game right here. I don't think there was any doubt in his mind that they weren't going to get the first down and that's what seperates 3 time superbowl champions from one hit wonders. With all that being said, It's going to take me 5 days to recover from this loss.
"I've got a couple of things to say real quick. You guys will probably have some questions after. This should hit on everything. [There] are just some things I'm thinking here real quick. We'll change it up. OK? "First play of the game, [I had an] early mistake. It can't happen. It put our offense in a tough spot. [It was] a great read. J-Co [Jerricho Cotchery] runs an awesome route and it's just a physical mistake and underthrown ball. The best part about it, the mental side of it, I battled back all game. "[I] played smarter the rest of the game [and I am] proud of my effort. Second thing [with] the interception, the defensive end makes a pretty good play. The guy got up there and just spooked me off the edge there and made a great play. In the big scheme of things, it didn't hurt us. We got the ball back. Our defense played their tail off and got us the ball. "The last drive of the game [was] just unbelievable effort. The offensive line [did a great job]. I've got some guys written down here: [David] Clowney, J-Co [Jerricho Cotchery], and Dustin [Keller], Braylon [Edwards]. Those third-down conversions were unbelievable. [It was] a great effort. "Clowney comes in and makes one huge catch. It changes the course of the game and keeps our drive alive. Then, the O-line [was] giving you tons of time on that drive. At the end of that drive, we scored. T.J. [Thomas Jones] punches it in. [With] the two-point conversion, I've got to put it on Braylon sooner. He makes a good effort going after the ball, but that ball has got to be there sooner so nobody can knock it out of his hands. "The bottom line to this whole thing, to this entire game, to our entire season is find a way to find a way. Coach [Ryan] challenged us already. We've got to find a way to win some games. Right now we're finding ways to lose, but we're in a position right now to sink or swim. I know we've got a lot of fight in us. We've got some great veteran leaders and they've been in spots like this before, so we're going to call on their leadership [and] call on our coaching. Great job today too from Schotty [Brian Schottenheimer] and Cav [Matt Cavanaugh]. [They had] just unbelievable play-calling in that last drive, so [it's] sink or swim [and] find a way to find a way."
What a complete douche. This isn't college or high school young fella. You can't come out like ron packard in 2007 with those faggy heart cards and think you're gonna inspire people with a fabricated speech. Just doesn't work that way. I've learned the hard way that you gotta put some production behind those promising words. I signed an oath last winter to protect Scott Boucher on the ice every game and what do I do? I go out with the sole intention of crushing bodies and hurting Sellberg's feelings. Just a day in the life of an enforcer.
C'mon, people. Give it a rest already. No one hates that the Yankees are world champions more than me but I'm not gonna spend my days bitching about it or coming up with excuses. It's just pointless. I mean I don't see them winning another title for 40 years but that's another post for another day. I'm just sick of my fellow sox fans throwing out the money factor and that the Yankees buy championships. Don't hurt my reputation. That's what 16 year old girls are for. This video is fucking pathetic. A team was willing to spend and risk more money than we were so we should be pissed? I'm more pissed at Boston for fucking up the Texeira deal than at him for actually winning with New York. Yes, this is by far the most humbled you will ever see me. Still think the Pats are going to win by over 700 points tonight, though.
I noticed I haven't gone all goo-goo dolls over Tom Terrific in a while. Or is it awhile? That shit always fucked me in the ass. Like 2 points off every paper for stupid fucking grammatical errors just because I was too lazy to google it. Whatever. I'm psyched, excited, pumped, jacked up and off for this game. It's not possible to over hype this game and that's something ESPN always seems to do very well. They also do a great job at having sex with their interns, sexually assaulting co-workers and getting caught in their hotel room as they check out their own ass. The K-Zone did revolutionize viewing baseball on TV, though. Can't deny that. They don't just hand out Emmys for picking ones own ass. Holla, Scans. Back to the game. I'd be terrified to face the Patriots today. Last weeks win against Miami was ugly but I got a feeling from that game that they didn't want to execute a full game plan to not give anything too revealing to Indy for tonight's game(That was the most "stop n go sentence I've ever read but I don't give a fuck. I got an A on a midterm and all I did was bullshit about sports, ESPN and agism. Moral of the story is I'm awesome.). It takes balls but when you have the greatest QB to ever play the game, you can take those chances. Ra ndy Moss and Wes Welker combine for 12 TD's tonight. Tom Chucks 14 TD passes, runs 4 in and knocks up some famous singer. Then he has banged the holy trinity. Actress, model and an entertainer. Pats win 146 to 0. Suck my balls, Peyton Manning
P.S. Notice how Tommy parted his hair. Look out Thanksgiving dinner. I'm not fucking around this year.
LAS VEGAS -- Manny Pacquiao's speed and power were way too much for Miguel Cotto's heart.Pacquiao put on yet another dominating performance Saturday night, knocking down Cotto twice and turning his face into a bloody mess before finally stopping him at 55 seconds of the 12th round. The Filipino star used his blazing speed and power from both hands to win his seventh title in seven weight classes and cement his stature as the best pound-for-pound fighter in the world. Cotto took such a beating that his face was a river of red from the fury of Pacquiao's punches, but he refused to quit even as his corner tried to throw in the towel after the 11th round. Manny Pacquiao may not tell you he's great, but he shows it every time he steps in the ring. He sent another message Saturday against Miguel Cotto and put his name in the history books, Dan Rafael writes. "I didn't know from where the punches were coming," Cotto said.
I'm back. Anytime a 144 pound man gives an absolute beat down, I have to be a part of it. I think you had to watch the HBO special 24/7 to really appreciate Pac-man. The guy trained in the Phillipines during a typhoon, was an actor in a filipino super hero movie and is the lead singer in his own band. All during the 4 weeks he has to prepare for the biggest fight of his career. Fucking awesome.
I think we stayed in the sun too long. Yes I did just quote Dashboard Confessional. I'm going on a clean break from society. No plans on when the blog will be back. Or myself for that matter.
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Struggling Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler has been fined $20,000 by the NFL for abusive conduct toward a game official during Chicago's blowout loss to Arizona in Week 9. Cutler was fined as a result of verbal abuse toward the back judge, which drew an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty in the Bears' 41-21 loss to the Cardinals. The Bears (4-5) have lost four of their past five games.
Dude. Really? Like motherfucking tittswallowing really? You throw 5 picks and you have the audacity to even raise your head? REALLY?! I've always hated Jay Cutler and it's because of punk ass moves like this. He thinks he's this gunslinger QB that can come out and toss interceptions like Brett Favre and it'll all be OK but it's not. #4 has a couple rings. Cutler doesn't. And I don't think Cutler ever will. I guess part of the reason is he's throwing passes to a guy is a career punt return man at best. If anything Devin Hester should be a cornerback. Not a Receiver. I've never seen him make a catch. Ever. Even back in 1999 during recess I'd be slinging that motherfucker cherry pop passes and he had butter fingers. You think it's easy being a 11 year old stud and having your wideouts drop balls while the ladies look on? I had to worry about my own balls dropping. What the fuck? I average about 3 posts a week where I don't even remember what I'm talking about by the end. hey paden sadler, don't disappoint tomorrow. go mills.
Is it wrong my whole attitude changed on this guy once I found out he wasn't Mexican? He seems like such a nice guy and he only weighs 144 pounds. And on top of that, he's the best pound for pound fighter in the world. What's not to like? Anyway, he fights Miguel Cotto tomorrow night. So this post was not totally irrelevant.
Michael Jordan apparently was in the house when the LeBron James(notes) and the Cleveland Cavaliers beat the Miami Heat down in Florida. His presence has apparently inspired James to give up the number he wears, No. 23, out of respect for Jordan, according to the Cleveland Plain Dealer.James will be wearing No. 6 next season, wherever he ends up. He apparently wants every player in the league to give up No. 23 out of respect for Jordan. "I just think what Michael Jordan has done for the game has to be recognized some way soon," James said. "There would be no LeBron James, no Kobe Bryant(notes), no Dwyane Wade(notes) if there wasn't Michael Jordan first."This, of course, equates to massive jersey sales next summer when James takes on his new number. The NBA should just give James some kind of bonus right now for the amount of cash he's about to bring the league.
I actually like this move and I hate Lebron. I get the whole #23 thing for basketball players when you're in high school or even in college. 98% of those guys will never sniff the jock of a NBA player. But when you have potential to be the greatest player of all time you have to have your own number. It's like grow the fuck up, Peter Pan. Kobe taking on 24 and now LBJ going to 6. And I'm not saying Lebron will ever be better than MJ because I don't think he will. He's not even better than Kobe and is only slightly better than Wade in my opinion. There are probably 8 guys I'd rather watch on TV than Lebron. He's just too much power and not enough finesse. People said MJ was like an artist on the court. Kobe is an artist. D-Wade mixes it all up. It's just more visually satisfying to watch someone like Kobe go out and execute a game plan than Lebron taking 3 dribbles and drawing contact to go to the foul line.
P.S. Lebron should get another number just for his nose. Is that racist?
The 22-year-old former ESPN production assistant whose affair with former Mets GM and baseball analyst Steve Phillips hit the front pages of the tabloids was on Good Morning America today. Brooke Hundley said, "I did things I regret, obviously. People make mistakes at 22. That's what I was trying not to do originally, was hurt anybody else or affect anybody else's lives negatively. But I did things and I thought about things just as an avenue to get people to pay attention, to start asking the right questions, to get me out of a bad situation."
Heyooooo! Wait. That can't be right. I'm a little concerned to see what this tubby temptress looked life before Steve Phillips had his way with her. My gut instinct says that she's a topper. And her gut says she's a little bit hungry. And now I'll let everyone say how much of an awful person I am for comparing her to the chimp victim. It's like everyone became so sensitive after 9/11. Smile a bit.
A publicist for Mike Tyson says the former boxing champ was merely defending his wife and 10-month-old child after an altercation with an overaggressive photographer at LAX on Wednesday. "Mike acted in self-defense as a father protecting his child," said Tyson's spokeswoman Tammy Brook. However, photographer Tony Echevarria, 50, said in video interview posted on TMZ.com that he "wasn't aggressive, I was shooting from a distance, and I was respectful." He indicated that his videotape should back up his story. LAX police Sgt. Jim Holcomb says Tyson allegedly hit the photographer once in the face with one hand.
Love Tyson. I don't know why anyone would put a camera in his face. You're just asking for a TKO. And that is all I have to say on this matter for fear that he'll come after me.
Taylor Swift, accepting Female Vocalist award, said she wanted to thank everyone in the audience “for not running up onstage during this speech.”
Stop. Just fucking stop. We get it. Kanye jumped on stage and ruined your moment. That was 2 months ago. Don't sit on your feelings for this long and then go on SNL last week and show up at the CMA's talking your shit like you're still hurt. You just sound like a bitter bitch who is seeking attention for something that wasn't even that big of a deal. The definition of a media whore. I hope no one still thinks she's "classy." If you have class, you don't throw daggers back when you're on the mic. You're supposed to act like nothing happened and pretend like you've been there before. And what the fuck are the CMA's? Does country music really have their own award show? I thought nobody watched the VMA's but I'm actually scared to know how many tune it to that country shit.
So Sean Avery has a website and has a blog on it(www.seanavery.com). Yada, yada, yada. He has a new clothing line, kicks ass on the ice, fucks ass off the ice, bangs any broad in his path, gets women pregnant and bails and is my hero. We know all this. But what we don't know what is on that plate next to the pitcher. They look like T-rex testicles if they had them. Whatever it is, it's fucking working.
CHICAGO - Multiple reports have it that the Red Sox made a four-year, $60 million offer to left fielder Jason Bay, though general manager Theo Epstein has not confirmed that. But if the Sox don’t retain Bay, the main power-hitting outfielder available is Matt Holliday, who is represented by Scott Boras. Holliday is basically Boras’s 2010 version of Mark Teixeira. While Boras hasn’t put a monetary figure on Holliday’s worth, you can assume that Boras will ask for (and may not get) at least Teixeira money (eight years, $180 million). Boras met with Epstein last night at the general managers’ meetings, and it is likely that Holliday’s name came up. Epstein has said that while he wants to pursue a deal with Bay, he won’t limit himself exclusively to negotiating with Bay in case it doesn’t work out. So Boras came calling for the usual introductory meeting about a major player.
As much as I'd like to see Jason Bay come back to Boston, I would love to see them get Matt Holliday. He just looks like a baseball player. Some guys have it and some guys don't. It pains me to say it but you can look at guys on the Yankees or Philly and you see that there best players are built. A-roid looks like an athlete. Ryan Howard looks like an athlete. Chase Utley is the prototypical ball player. Matt Holliday also looks like an athlete. Jason Bay looks like a volleyball player. That's where the difference is between the two guys. And signing either one of them wont be answer to winning it all next year. I think the secret is Adrian Gonzalez. If that means trading prospects packaged with an Ellsbury or Papelbon then so be it. No one wants Lowell, Ortiz or even JD Drew and you gotta think that Pedroia, Lester and Martinez are untouchable. Youk should be but he's probably not and that scares the shit out of me because the Youk-Pedroia combo is ten times better than Cano-Texeira. I just went off on a tangent. The bottom line is the Sox are going to sign either Bay or Holliday and they'll trade for Gonzalez. I got a funny feeling that Theo hooked his assistant GM up with a job over there in San Diego with the promise that he'll deliver us Gonzo. Things look good.
haha ya well we will see what happens this year.... i finally know how to skate now so ill be the new sean avery
Dylan Sellberg
sean avery's dead.
There are a couple things I'd like to clear up. First, there is no "new Sean Avery." I don't remember calling the league offices and hanging the skates up. You wanna try to take the title from me then be my guest. It's quite a burden always being awesome. I have yet to see someone else who can combine on-ice intensity with off-ice sex appeal like #16 and myself. And secondly, there are no boards out there, just snow banks. So when Sellberg said he was banging players up against the boards he was obviously dreaming. That kid couldn't bang a hooker even if he tried. As far as Mikey O calling me out on facebook pictures for my lack of skating skills goes, let's just say the story ends with him going into the wall. If we have learned anything from history it's that you don't want to fire up a guy like me. It's just silly. Haven't you seen my HBMHL highlight reel? They're so quick to say I spend a lot of time on my ass but no one wants to admit how finishing my checks up and down is what leads to quick goals coming from the high slots. I guess I'm gonna finish with a proclamation of sorts. If anyone steps to me on the ice and you want to dance with my flying fists in the middle of rink, I will literally fuck your face.
HAMILTON, Ohio -- A Hamilton teenager was suspended for getting a haircut that looks like a Cincinnati Bengals helmet, WLWT in Cincinnati reported.Dustin Reader, 14, said that he got the helmet shaved into his hair because he's a huge fan of the football team.But administrators at Garfield Middle School were not a fan of the eighth-grader's haircut. They said it violated the school's code of conduct, which prohibits "extreme or distracting haircuts and hairstyles.""I didn't think he'd get in trouble for it," said Dustin's mother, Tina Wanamaker.A representative of the school confirmed that Dustin was suspended and will remain on suspension until his haircut is toned down.Reader's father said he has no plans to change the haircut."It is harmless. The Bengals are fielding a team that (is) winning this time, and that hasn't been in a few years, so why not be happy and ecstatic and show your appreciation for the team?" said James Reader. "It will grow out, but until it does, it's going to stay just the way it is."
Hey asshole, where were when the Bengals sucked and they needed fans like this? I don't think the school should suspend the kid because it's distracting. He should be suspended because he sucks. He's probably the type of guy who came out of the wood work when the Celts acquired KG and starts looking up all of Pedroia's stats once the playoffs roll around. It just fucking disgusts me. But anyway, this kid is going to look like a serious d-bag in like 4 weeks when his precious Bengals come back to earth. They're 6-2 right now. No way they win more than 9 games this year and I think the Steelers are going to be the team that knocks them back down on Sunday. Let's just hope #85 keeps his stats padded for my fantasy football team's sake.
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