There's a Heavyweight Title Fight Tomorrow And Nobody Cares Except Me

 British WBA champion David Haye practices during a training session in Hamburg, northern Germany, Wednesday, June 29, 2011, for Saturday’s heavyweight title bout against WBO and IBF champion Wladimir Klitschko of the Ukraine. Klitschko, the IBF and WBO champion, is the favorite (55-3, 49 KOs), and at 6-foot-6, has a 3-inch height advantage. Klitschko weighed in Friday at 242 pounds, compared to 213 pounds for the 30-year-old Haye. Undefeated in seven years, the 35-year-old Ukrainian tends to wear down his opponents with his jab before hammering them with a right cross.

I don't really get why this hasn't gotten more play on the ESPN or whatever. Is it because it's two non American fighters who are fighting in Germany and the fight is for free on HBO so nobody really makes a profit by selling and buying ads? Probably but I don't give a shit. Like Joe Biden once said, "This is a big fucking deal." I know I'm supposed pledge my allegiance to my fellow Ukrainian blood but Klitschko can suck a dick. He's a pussy. And a dork. I tend to not like hanging out with guys who could be described as dorky with no balls. Plus he dated Hayden for like 6 months. I don't care if they dated 2 weeks ago or if they dated 10 years ago. The fact of the matter is she saw his penis and he saw both of her chesticles and that automatically makes me hate him and if I was big enough I'd kick his ass at center ice. So obviously I'm rooting for David Haye, right? No so fast. He's a bit of a pussy too. He's sort of like a Floyd Mayweather type. Great boxing record, some pretty solid hits but he's ducked the big hitters for years and seems to write checks with his mouth that his fists can't cash. Not exactly my type. In a perfect world, both fighters would bash each others brains in, give us a great fight and then fall into a coma and eventually die 4 weeks later when the families decide to pull a plug on both boxers.




P.S. The fight is tomorrow at 4:45 PM. How fucking awesome is that? If that doesn't scream day drinking then I don't know what does. I have HBO, fellas. Come on over. Except Jordon Brault. You piss me off, bro.