Seth Meyers hosted the ESPYs Wednesday night for the 2nd straight year. His opening monologue was perfect. He killed it. He was like Casey Anthony around 2-year-olds. Too soon? Or not soon enough? In case you're wondering who the chocolate hottie standing next to Dirk is in the above picture well it's his Swedish girlfriend Jessica Olsson.
Meyers ripped on pretty much everyone in sports including: LeBron James, Brian Wilson, Vancouver, Brian Cardinal!, Mark Cuban, the Nets and Michael Vick.
All of the jokes were pretty funny but my favorite was: "Yao Ming announced that he's retiring from basketball. Or that he's re-tiling his bathroom. It's really hard to say." Making fun of how Asian people speak gets me every time. Or actuarry ristening to them speak.
Oh yeah, then there was Brian Wilson wearing a spandex tuxedo suit and again trying wayyyy too hard. We get it, you're fit for a straitjacket. He's fucked three ways towards the weekend. And you wanna know what? I don't dig it anymore. It doesn't turn me on.
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