Before we dissect what went down I need to apologize. I wanted to get this done by friday and then by saturday but then I just continued living my life(which consists of taunting Matty Berman via Twitter. Yes, matty b of www.oxygenashtray.blogspot.com fame). Nothing too memorable happened, though. There was actually more action in the reunion show than on the finale but whatever. Here are your key points. For the last time. Or until another show captivates me like this one did.
-Pauly D asks The Situation what his plans are after the Jersey Shore. His Response: Go to Rhode Island. Don't say the guy doesn't have priorities.
-Ronnie got arrested and Snooki didn't know whether to call 911, urgent care, or the police department.
-I want somebody to put together a 5 minute montage of The Situation unsuccessfully using the phone to call girls.
-Poor Snooki. Poor, poor Snooks.
-These girls don't even hide it anymore. They want a man on steroids or growth hormones. Or a "gorilla juice head."
-"Big is out and lean is in. thin, thin is in, baby."-The Situation. If I could go back in time this would be my senior quote.
"There's definetly a possibility with me leaving the shore with possibly a date for the rest of the holidays. 'Hey ma this is my girlfriend for the next couple months until I break up with her and summer starts." The Situation
-Ronnie and Sammi went out on a date and toasted to themselves going past the Jersey Shore. They didn't even get past 11:40 on the reunion special.
-The Situation and Snooki making out was what we in the Biz call a "sympathy hook up." Girl went through so much all day that it would be a crime to deny her and break her heart again.
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