Let's Just Dedicate This Day To Sean Avery

After being sidelined with a sprained MCL from a collision in a morning skate with Ryan Callahan, Sean Avery returned to the ice for the Rangers' practice on Wednesday in preparation for the start of the season, the Journal News reports. Avery underwent the new PRP procedure, which involved having his blood drawn and re-injected to speed up the healing process of the sprained MCL. He did not participate in the contact portions of practice, but did say his knee was feeling better. “I’m certainly ahead of schedule, so either it’s the PRP or I’m actually Superman like I claim to be,” Avery told the Journal News. "They know with me that we just kind of go as I feel, and it’s tough to set guidelines because I don’t generally follow them too well. I like to just push it as quickly as I can, and be responsible, and our training staff are certainly some of the best, so they’re not going to let me do anything that’s going to put me in jeopardy.”

When it rains good news, it fucking pours. It's either the PRP or he really is just superman. Couldn't have said it better myself

Look At How Hot Sean Avery's New GF Is

According to the New York Post, it is said with New York’s Daily News that model Hilary Rhoda is still dating New York Jets’ quarterback Mark Sanchez. I’m sorry Daily News, but that is “Ancient History”. In all likelihood, the Daily News incorporated a photo from the quarterback and the model’s GQ photoshoot in the June 2009 edition that could be seen in The Post last May, and included in the article yesterday, claiming that Sanchez and Rhoda are still playing on the same team. However, the model has made other passes, right into the arms of another team player and hockey star, Sean Avery. A source close to Avery has confirmed that the couple were seen at Avery’s TriBeCa bar and says that “Sean and Hilary are definatley an item”.

Ohhhh Snap! Take that Mark Sanchez. You wanna run around like you're hot shit because you're 3-0 and you got the world by the short and curlies. But you don't. The chick that everyone thought you were banging has actually been underneath #16 the entire time. I can sleep well at night now knowing that guys like me and Sean Avery are back on top. I guess Mercury has come back into orbit and all that shit. Honestly, I feel like my motherfucking mojo has just been rejuvenated at this very moment. Watch out bitches. I've come back to reclaim my thrown.

This Chick Is a 8 on Powers' Scale. -4 On Mine.

GREENWICH, Conn. -- A Greenwich psychic who said she was attacked by rival psychics has been charged with lying about the incident.Greenwich police arrested 35-year-old Janet Lee of Norwalk on Saturday. She was charged with falsely reporting an incident.Lee promotes herself as the "foremost psychic in New England."Lee called police on July 11 to report that a man had beaten her outside of her Greenwich office. She said that she believed that rival psychics in town, who had left her threatening messages, were responsible.

With all due respect, if you're going to call yourself the "foremoast psychic in New England" you better be able to back that shit up. How? Oh, I don't know. Maybe you should have seen this coming. It's like when some kid talks his game up about how he's some flip cup master back at school but then he comes home and becomes the first queer we kick off our squad in survivor series.

YOU'RE SO GAY

Stephen Jackson. I Always Get Him Confused With Ricky Davis

OAKLAND, Calif. -- Stephen Jackson still would like to be traded from the Golden State Warriors and doesn't regret his comments saying he would like to be dealt. On Monday, he even went as far as to say he regrets nothing in his career, speaking specifically about going into the stands with then-Indiana teammate Ron Artest during an ugly brawl with the Detroit Pistons in 2004. Jackson unloaded his frustrations with the franchise during media day Monday, reiterating public comments he made last month that he wants out so he has a more realistic chance at getting to the playoffs. Jackson said he is unhappy with the team's decline since reaching the second round of the 2007 playoffs to end a 13-year postseason drought. The Warriors' leading scorer and top defensive player was fined $25,000 by the NBA earlier this month for saying so.

I know what you're thinking. I didn't know Stephen Jackson was the leading scorer or even a top defensive player for the Warriors. In fact, I didn't even know Golden State still had a basketball team. I guess Oakland is where all wastes of life go to die. I don't really have an analogy on this one. Being the best player on a shitty team is like the hot chick with herpes from africa. Yeah, she doesn't have Aids yet but you know it's inevitable. So why trade for a guy like Jackson? Just asking for trouble I say.

Apparently New York Is The Place To Be

And apparently the Patriots played a game yesterday. I wouldn't know though. The fine state of CT and the media terrorists over at Fox decided that the Giants/Bucs game was more important. Now all of a sudden everyone is looking at the G-men and Jets and proclaiming then super bowl favorites. Oh, and the Yankees too. Let's not forget who they have on their team. Little guy named A-rod. The same player who vanishes every time the month of October rolls around. Oh and the ace of the pitching staff is a fat piece of shit who never won a playoff game. So they have that going for them. I think they won the division in 2004 and 2007 and we all know how that ended for them. So, no. I'm not the least bit worried about those skanks from jew york. And I'm not gonna devote any time for Mark Sanchez and the jets due to the fact that I still have no respect for them. Giants aren't too shabby when they're not whining about bush league plays after a victory.

Create Different Meta Tag on Blogger Platform.

Happy blogging.After view day not make any posting, today i try to share new tips for creating different meta tag on blogger platform. As we now that blogger create duplicate meta tag. When you create meta tag, all page on your blog have the same meta tag. And this is not good in indexing and serp.

We can use simple way with algoritm technique. Using conditional IF to solve this problem. All you have to do just read this below explanation and try on your blog.


Go to your dashbord menu. Dashboard »Layout» Edit htm. Find this sentences :

<b:include data='blog' name='all-head-content'/>

And add this code below :

<b:if cond='data:blog.url == "http://yourblog.blogspot.com/"'>
<meta content='DESCRIPTION' name='description'/>
<meta content='KEYWORDS' name='keywords'/> </b:if>

With that code we create meta tag for home page. To make different meta tag for each post do you have. Just copy and type code like upstair and change the URL Homepage with your URL Posting or Page.

<b:if cond='data:blog.url == "http://yourblog.blogspot.com/"'>
<meta content='DESCRIPTION' name='description'/>
<meta content='KEYWORDS' name='keywords'/> </b:if>
<b:if cond='data:blog.url == "http://yourblog.blogspot.com/page"'>
<meta content='DESCRIPTION' name='description'/>
<meta content='KEYWORDS' name='keywords'/> </b:if>

So simple with conditional IF. Now you have different meta tag for each post on your blog.

Russian Wants The Nets.

EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. -- Could the New Jersey Nets become the Nyets? The basketball team once known as the New Jersey Americans is a step closer to being owned by Russia's richest man, Mikhail Prokhorov, who on Wednesday said he has a deal to buy 80 percent of the NBA team and nearly half of a project to build a new arena in Brooklyn. The proposed blockbuster deal would give the Nets' current principal owner, Bruce Ratner, the needed cash to move forward with the centerpiece of his Atlantic Yards development, which includes plans for retail and residential projects. It would make Prokhorov, a Russian billionaire and former amateur basketball player, the NBA's first non-North American owner.

Before I get started let it be known that I have no problems with the Russians. 25% of me is an ex-soviet. Try to tell me that Ukraine aint weak. We can go out back and sip our pints from the Irish motherland and pick a fight or we can throw some shots of stoli down the shoot and praise Vladimir Putin. I'm down for whatever. Just don't bring up Chernobyl. I digress. Why the fuck would you want to but the Nets? They don't even have Vince Carter aymore. You want to build a franchise around Devin Harris? Don't get me wrong, he's on the rise as a superstar but he'll never reach a Chris Paul level. He just can't. Guys from Wisconsin don't have it in them. It's science. If this dude has so much money then I don't see why he just doesn't buy the entire league. That's what I would do if I had the cash. I just hope this doesn't end in typical Russian fashion. Think cold war. I don't want this guy to threaten to buy the team only to have everyone else here boost their offers. I'll call his bluff right now if I have to. I'm not gonna have to resort to hiding under my desk because some Russians like to fuck around.

It's Time To Panic

AVERY AILING: LW Sean Avery was getting around the Rangers' training rink in Greenburgh on crutches yesterday, one day after spraining his right knee in a morning-skate collision with RW Ryan Callahan. The Rangers offered no update on Avery's condition, but his status for the Oct. 2 season opener remains in doubt.

What. The. Fuck. Is the whole world against me or something? I guess this explains the reason for my slumping mojo. If #16 isn't even able to hit the ice then I have no hope. Mercury needs to fucking come back into orbit.



Not so sure about using "Till I Collapse" though. Feel like after every high school basketball team used it to run out to it should've been banned by the year 2006.

Milton's Mom Wants The Cubbies To Take Her Baby Boy Back

The mother of banished Chicago Cubs outfielder Milton Bradley said her son would consider returning to the team if it will have him back. The Cubs suspended the volatile Bradley on Sunday for the rest of the season for what amounted to conduct detrimental to the team, one day after he criticized the franchise in a newspaper interview. Speaking to the Chicago Sun-Times on Tuesday, Charlena Rector said: "All the people on TV keep saying, 'Oh, Milton has played his last game for the Cubs.'" But, she added, that won't be the case if Bradley has any say with management. "Milton eats, sleeps and drinks baseball. He loves it. That's all he wants to do," Rector told the newspaper. Cubs general manager Jim Hendry said he decided to send Bradley home after learning of the player's remarks in the (Arlington Heights) Daily Herald of Illinois. Bradley, who was scratched from Saturday's lineup with a sore left knee, was quoted as saying, "You understand why they haven't won in 100 years here."

Is that really all he said? Maybe I have a soft spot for bad boys but this is really reaching for a suspension. It's not his fault the Cubs have sucked balls for the past 100 years. I just don't get it. There used to be a day when you could run your mouth off, drink beers, play the game, unknowingly spread HIV and everyone would love you. And I don't really care that his mother is getting in on this fight. It's rule #1 that you protect women and children first. Untouchable as far I'm concerned.

(817): youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?

Very creepy(Dylan Sellberg). It's not creepy that a male was chatting up a female. But facebook chatting is the creepiest. And let that be a notice for everyone. If you ever facebook chat me, I will respond the only way I know how to in that situation. Call you a sketchy bastard and tell you that you need to get your tubes tied. Why? Because nobody puts baby in a corner. I mean I get it if it's an emergency situation or you're my mother and have no way of contacting me and you want to know what I want for my birthday. But if I'm there staring at pictures of myself and I get this box that says, "hey, what's up?" Then it's game on. If I wanna chat, I'll go on AIM. That's why they're all there. On Facebook, I wanna stalk people without ever being noticed. To talk to someone on there means you have to actually take time away from stalking to look up if they're also on doing the same thing you are. Just awkward.

Some Jerk Will Pay MJ's Charity $100,000 If He Plays 21

LEHI, Utah -- The owner of the Utah Jazz's NBA Development League team wants to see Michael Jordan go 1-on-1 against Bryon Russell one more time. Brandt Andersen is offering a $100,000 donation to the charity of the winner's choice if he can get Jordan and Russell to play a game of 21. Jordan's jumper over Russell in Game 6 of the 1998 NBA finals gave the Chicago Bulls a 4-2 series win over Utah. Jazz fans still insist Jordan pushed off Russell. During Jordan's Hall of Fame speech, he said he was motivated by Russell's trash talk toward him during his first retirement. Andersen says he has spoken to Russell and left a message for Jordan through a mutual friend. Andersen's suggestion: Jordan vs. Russell during halftime of the Utah Flash's home opener.

Listen, Brandt. Or Brand. Or Brad. Or jerk off. You want the greatest off all time to play a game of 21 against a guy who is only famous for playing piss poor defense? And during halftime of a D-league game? Not even a NBA game. This isn't some kid with down syndrome living out his dream. This is MJ. Air Jordan. His Airness. I'll be damned if I see my favorite athlete and childhood hero have to sink to that level to make some piece of shit owner pleased. I'd like to get a couple clean shots at every coach I've ever had but you won't find me walking into the gym during a mills game to throw some punches. And it also clear that Bryon Russell needs money. That game 6 was really all he had in life. I mean I wasn't sure if his name was Bryon or Byron until I wrote this story. I guess that's a price you pay when your sad mug has been on my wall for the past 10 years as MJ stabs every Jazz fan in the heart.

Justin Tuck Would Like Your Sympathy

EAST RUTHERFORD, N.J. -- The New York Giants are a little miffed at Dallas Cowboys' offensive tackle Flozell Adams. Adams stuck out his leg and tripped Pro Bowl defensive end Justin Tuck in the first half of Sunday night's game, causing Tuck to suffer an injury to his left shoulder. It knocked him out of the nationally televised contest. Adams was penalized for tripping on the play, but that didn't stop Tuck from call the kick a "bush" move. "It's something he always does and he gets away with it and he continues to do it," Tuck said. Fellow defensive end Mathias Kiwanuka said a lot of the Giants players were talking about it on Monday. "From being out there and seeing the quick replays, it looked like a pretty bad play," Kiwanuka said. "Guys get beat and they have to do anything to save their quarterback, but that is not an excuse."

Oh Boo-fucking-hoo. What the fuck man? You're a football player. You play to win the game. It's like every player from that city suddenly grows a vagina once they put on a new york uniform. Except for Sean Avery of course. Tom Terrific gets his ACL ripped to shreds a year ago on a "bush" play but he doesn't fucking whine to the media like a little bitch because he's done for the year. You take your lumps like a man and move on. Maybe grow a pair and get back at this asshole on your own terms. But now you draw attention to yourself and expect everyone to pat your back and have your mother rub some oil on your bottom and have her tell you everything is going to be OK. Well it's not. If Adams always pulls this shit why aren't the other guys complaining about it? Oh, that's right. It's 'cause that's what 17 year old girls on their periods do. The fucking Giants disgust me. Yuck.

91 Year Old Naked Man Stops Intruder.

LAKE WORTH, Fla. -- Authorities said a naked 91-year-old man was able to hold a drunken intruder at gunpoint until deputies arrived.Robert E. Thompson jumped out of bed early Saturday when his dog starting growling and attacking the intruder. He said he got his revolver and went out back to let the guy know how he felt about home invaders. Thompson, a World War II veteran, said he didn't even notice he was standing outside in the dark without any clothes on. Authorities arrived to find a man being held outside by a naked homeowner.

First off, I wanna know who wrote this article. It takes a real master of the english language to slip in that little piece of witty humor. I can picture the guy with a smirk on his face as he typed, "went out back to let the guy know how he felt about home invaders." Anyway. Gotta hand to the old man in this story for being able to keep his head on a swivel. Drunk guy stumbles in your house and the only line of defense between you and your naked body is a revolver. Everyone knows if there is one thing you don't fuck with it's a 91 year old guy with his balls hanging out. The guy went through WWII for christ's sake. He's got nothing to prove and he has no problem with sticking it to someone if it means defending his territory. And the best part about this is he didn't let the guy go. He makes him stay outside with him and stare at his naked body. Just classic. They used to call that torture 101 until those fuck-tards from Geneva had to step in and become buzz kills.

Remember That Baseball Team From Boston?

Well they're only 5 games back and about 600 billion games ahead in the wild card race. 3 games coming up against the Royals and the Stanks have 3 against the Angels. Uhhh-Ooohhhh. Try and tell me they're not the most dangerous team in baseball right now. You can't find one team that wants to come into Boston in October and face the most dominant 4 starters in the past 2 weeks. I don't know. Just some food for thought. And yes, thinking about this totally distracts me from the fact that we got beat by Mark Sanchez and the rest of those scumbags from Jew York.

Hey Fellas, He's Single.

You know what PMU stands for, right? I'll let your mind wander on that one.

I Can't Come Back From This One

If anyone knows where the old Tom Brady is then let me know. It's like a piece of my heart is missing.

This Is Gonna Be My New "Thing"

Keep fuckin' that chicken fellas. Most versatile phrase ever created in my opinion.

Get Your Weekend Started With Roy Keane Bringing The Thunder

Nothing like a fiery irish man to get things started.

Coach Makes Kid Drink Blood

NEW BRITAIN, Conn. -- According to lawsuit filed Thursday afternoon, a Central Connecticut State University student is accusing his former track coach of forcing him to drink blood. Charles Ngetich came to CCSU on a scholarship from Kenya but is no longer at the university after what his lawyer describes as an awful initiation ritual by his track coach during his freshman year. In the lawsuit, it is alleged that track coach George Kawecki told Ngetich that he would like to see him drink blood. Ngetich thought the coach was joking and told him no. However, two weeks later, Kawecki tried again, telling him that he saw a documentary about a Kenyan group that drinks blood for rituals. The complaint states, “In the presence of several members of the team, coach Kawecki produced a cup of blood, told the plaintiff he was too thin, needed calcium, and demanded that the plaintiff drink it. This young man thought he had no option, and he drank the blood." Attorney Josephine Miller said the bullying and pressure continued for two years. Miller said, “He had a number of comments made to him about Africa, the poverty there. He was traumatized and became despondent, almost to the point of suicide." Ngetich’s track and school performances dropped so low that he lost his scholarship in 2008. His friends said that he keeps his depression bottled up. They are just as angry that a university coach would be so insensitive to an international student. The complaint doesn’t state how much of the blood he said he was forced to drink.

Oh stop being such a pussy. So your coach made you drink a little blood and poked fun at your native country. You wanna be a Blue Devil right? Grow a set then come talk to me. You're an athlete. That's a privelige, not a right. As far as I'm concerned, if I'm the coach and you come into my domain then all bets are off. I might even let some goons come in from the prison and let them bat your shit around. Prove to me your tough enough. That you're mentally as well as physically strong. In my day, we'd make those freshman crawl between our legs as we punched them right in the grundle. Joking, of course. Let's be honest. How fucking insane is this story? Where the fuck did the blood come from? I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that when they further investigate this couch, they'll find a basement that resembles something from the house of 1000 corpses. They kid needed calcium? Maybe a glass of milk would go down easier. Just a thought. Now, this coach is going to say that he didn't actually force the kid to drink the blood. However, being the pre-law student that I am, we can look at case #327788(1.5) the state of CA V. Jones where it explicitly states the use of intimidation as force is a valid argument in the realm of hazing. Wham. You just got served. Literally.

Don't go look up that case number. Just know I'm right.

Seriously. Where did they get the blood from?

Find Him. Now.

I might not agree with how this dude likes to bang but anyone who can go on a rant for 5 minutes is OK by me. The bottom line is I can't do this all on my own anymore. Too much shit do between crying myself to sleep, signing multi-million dollar deals, and getting my heart broken. This kid just seems like he has all the fire power needed to fill the void. Unless anyone knows how I can get in contact with Jordon Brault's agent.

Blah, Blah, Blah

The New York Jets' defenders are talking big for their Week 2 matchup against the New England Patriots. Earlier this week, defensive tackle Kris Jenkins called this game the Jets' "Super Bowl" and on Wednesday, free safety Kerry Rhodes said he wanted to "embarrass" the Patriots. The Patriots (1-0) have owned the Jets (1-0) since Bill Belichick became their coach in 2000, going 13-6, including one playoff game, against New York. Tom Brady and Co. have won the past eight games played against the Jets at the Meadowlands. "You go out from the first quarter on, from the first play on, and try to embarrass them," Rhodes said, according to the New York Daily News. "Not just go out there and try to win, try to embarrass them. Try to make them feel bad when they leave here. We don't want to just beat them. We want to send a message to them, 'We're not backing down from you and we expect to win this game, and it's not going to be luck, it's not going to be a mistake.'

Did I miss something here? Hasn't there only been 1 game played this year? So the Jets beat the Texans and all of a sudden people are ready to call them super bowl contenders. Listen, you wanna crown their ass, then crown 'em. You wanna talk about going at Brady's knees then be my guest. I see a pretty little brace on Sanchez's knee too so let the fucking games begin. I'm just waiting for people to smarten the fuck up. Don't you know what happens if you talk shit about Bill's boys? Just asking for cruel and unusual punishment. I don't know. I'm not really feeling this shit today. 5 pages on the sociology of aging will do that to a man. Gerontology for life.

Eagles Cut Kendra's BF Or Husband Or Whatever

Hilarious. Might be a little hard to buy that new baby crib without an income, Hank Baskett. Look at Kendra in this picture. Me and Sells had a big fight a while ago about how hot she is and I said without make up on, she's the equivalent to a 7 in B-town. Maybe a 5 in Hollywood. Because everyone knows, there is a two scale system. It's such a shame because this guy doesn't dip below a 8.5. Unless I've dipped in my cooler for 8.5 brewskers. Then you're all fair game as far as I'm concerned.

It's About That Time Again I Suppose...

Last time I did this sort of thing, I got bitches walking up to me saying how much they loved #17 and so on(that never happened).

1) Made a few new friends this summer. First name is Mike. Last name Patel. Middle name is Shoeless. That's about it. Best GM I've ever met. He's served bagels in his office because he didn't have a lobby. He also didn't wear shoes. Ever. Hope he doesn't have a foot fetish.

2) Dave Schur once told me that love is only for the lucky. Never have those words ever been more true. SchurLandscrrrrapin4eva.

3) Saw a picture of a guy I respect and noticed he cut the sleeves off his sox shirt. I'm all about the cutoff but you can't go defacing championship material like that. I could see Celts cause it's bball but come the fuck on. It just hurt me. That's all. Had to get that off my chest.

4)Lucas Scott isn't on OneTreyHill anymore. It's criminal.

5) Tim Scans is gonna have to pay me $5,000.00 and an emmy if he ever wants to see his Minnesotta Gopher shorts again.

6) I'm over Hayden.

7) Remember when Billy Bayne used to blog? Bahahahahahahaha. Adorable. It was like a puppy lost in his own dog house or something.

8) I'm waiting for these other blogs to catch up. They all keep coming for my crown. Kinda feel like the 1996 Bulls.

9) I graduated from Kindergarten in '96. That's what we call a paradox.

10) I got 99 problems and they all bitches.

11) I don't know who Shanil Dessai is but I do know I beat that ass in fantasy this weekend. I do know he has a sister named Shreena and I yelled it out at a party in the summer of '08. Really had to be there.

12) What up Sellberg? Don't you wish you could get back with thissssssssss?

13) Jordon Brault just posted a 9 minute facebook video. I shit you not. It's worth 9 minutes of your life. I'm setting up a post for it later tonight.

14) I dare anyone to try and take me, berm, ksmitts and nastynesty in rockband. You can't fuck with these vocals on Beat It.

15) Don't you wanna know what Jay-Z song was playing when Miley was in that taxi? Bet it was Show Me What U Got or something main stream like that. Fuck her.

16) Party in the 860 will be the next big club banger. We've been in the lab cooking that shit up all month. Just get ready.

17) I'll go crazy if I don't go crazy tonight. That's what Dan Donahue said to me once and we had the best fucking party this side of the mississippi has ever seen.

18) You play to win the game.

19) Listen. I don't wanna wait until tomorrow to tell you how I feel about the rest of my life.

20) You know what really fucks my day up? People not using their blinker. Ok, don't let me know you're turning. I'm just gonna ram my car up your anal cavity then spill out your throat.

21) It's been about 2 months and I'm still reeling from the loss of MJ. Such a pioneer.

22) Sox just blew a 5-3 lead after being down 3-0. I'm barely able to finish this post without yelling motherfucker in my cat's ears. He doesn't deserve that.

23) Manny Otagho. Tell me that boy aint fine.

24) Scott Boucher is the 2010 James Beddingfield. Quote me on that.

25) If they say, "why? why?" tell them that it's human nature.

26) Remember tips 4 tits? Never really took off like I thought it would. Maybe because it was coming from a kid who never touched a pair of tits until he got a GF in March. She's 15. From bristol. Red hair. Just keeps getting worse....

27)

28) #27 is how my heart feels.

29) Jonna from the Real World. I'd marry that girl. What a hot fucking mess. Love her.

30) Kanye West hates white people.

Woman Spanks Stranger's Son

CINCINNATI -- A woman took a stranger's toddler son over her knee and spanked him three times inside a Salvation Army Outside court, Ballard denied wrongdoing and said she gave the boy a hug and gently patted his backside because he was upset. store after he said something that annoyed her, police said Wednesday. Gloria Ballard was arrested on an assault charge in the Tuesday incident. In a court appearance Wednesday, she asked for a public defender and a not guilty plea was entered for her. She was also ordered to stay away from 2-year-old Sean Goode and his mother, Donnay Jones. Jones said her son got spanked after Ballard told her she should make him behave. "She was basically trying to tell me what to do with my son," Jones told WLWT-TV. She told Ballard she would handle her own business and son. Then, she said, Ballard took Sean from her and spanked him, causing him to cry.

I got nothin' on this one. Have I wanted to smack a kid in the face before? Yes. Have I? I can't say. Those things are still under litigation. But there is a line you just don't cross and this bitch leaped over it. You can't interfere with a mother-child relationship. Those are rules that were bestowed upon us before the beginning of time. On the other hand, you gotta hand it to this broad. It takes some serious balls to grab a kid and start smacking ass.

If You're a Guy And Watched The VMA's...

You were in good company I guess. Not like there was a sunday night football game on or anything. Maybe you and this Zac Efron looka-a-like can go back in time and fuck each other. How does this kid get 3 million views and I only average 36 hits a day?


P.S. I don't think Kanye did a little hair flip before he said his piece. Fag.

Hi, I'm a Yankee Fan and I Just Shit The Bed

Listen, there is no way in hell the Yankees aren't looking behind there shoulder tonight. We're not gonna win the AL East. That's a given. I'm OK with that. But Dice-K pitched 6 shutout innings tonight and only walked 3. Beckett is back and Lester and Bucholz have been pitching there ass off for the past 2 months. That's 4 pitchers who could probably be the ace of any other staff. The bottom line is this. In October you only need 4 pitchers. Our bullpen has been nothing short of phenomenal all year and the offense is always there when we need it. Gimme that ring.

Tom Terrific Brings The Noise On Kolber

This aint the editing room hunny. You can't come at the most prolific passer this generation has ever seen and expect a gimme. This guy just came off the field guns blazing and you expect him to slow his roll for a chump journalist like you? Maybe a loser like Peyton. Not a 3-time superbowl champion though.

OHH BABBYYYYYY!

That's how they write it up folks. Give us an inch to breath and we're gonna take the whole yard. You can't give Tom Terrific 2 minutes to orchestrate the most powerful offense and not expect 7 points. That's just suicide. But on some real. That game took 13 years off my life and it was so fucking worth it.

R.I.P. Patrick Swayze

Nobody puts Baby in a corner........

I Love You.

If I'm Buffalo or anyone else in the league then I don't even show up when it comes time to play the Pats. It's absolutely disgusting to hear people say that a punk like Eli is can even breath the same air as Brady just because of his new contract. Whatever. The NFL has been warned. TB12 is back and better than ever.

Kanye West Is a Silly Bitch

Taylor Swift seemed pretty surprised herself to have won the VMA for Best Female Music Video on Sunday evening, but the real shock came when Kanye West suddenly burst onto the stage and rudely stole the microphone from the country crooner during her acceptance speech."Yo Taylor, I’m really happy for you, I’ll let you finish, but Beyoncé has one of the best videos of all time," West said. "One of the best videos of all time!"

I don't really understand why people are so shocked about this. I feel like this shit is to be expected from a guy like Kanye. All this moment needed was for Joe Wilson to yell from the nose bleeds, "you lie!" right after Kanye said Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time and show a shot of Nancy Pelosi furiously shaking her head. That would have been a top 10 moment for eternity. And I don't really get what all the fuss is about Taylor Swift. If you like listening to some bitch sing about her boy problems and whine about life as a 15 year old then by all means she's your type of gal but if you're like me and you still seek some music with actual emotion then I'd move on. First of all, she's not even hot. I've never liked my women tall, lanky and fair skinned. I'll go marry a white pole instead. It probably has more personality. On top of that, she has no back bone. I don't care if Ray Lewis jumps on stage and grabs my mic. I'm taking that thing back and the story ends with him going into a wall. She just stood there helpless. It was fucking pathetic. I thank God everyday that people like Kanye are still around to tell it like it is. Why settle for a lifetime of mediocrity? That's what we all should ask ourselves every time there is a Taylor Swift song playing.

P.S. Lady Gaga. What the fuck?

Double P.S. Kanye is setting black people back 100 years. Yeah, I just said that.

Fantasy Football is Where Dreams Go To Die

That and Sellberg's gaping vagina. But seriously. Your fantasy teams looks so fucking good up until 7:00 tonight and then it takes on a whole different shape. Two weeks ago, you get drunk and take a chance on a guy like Steve Slaton in the 2nd round. You could've took LT but that would be way too easy and also predictable. I like to keep the bitches on there toes. Sometimes you have to beat around the bush. You wanna be that guy at the end of the season with a Slaton on your squad and a ticket to eat with the Gods. Oh, and Desean jackson was your big sleeper pick last year so you figure you better waste a 5th round pick on him only to have his QB go out in the 3rd fucking quarter. Who knows what his health is gonna be like the rest of the year. Now there's a chance Desean will be catching balls from some kid named Kevin and a dude who was in jail at this time a year ago. And somehow you got Philip Rivers as your starting QB even though there isn't another player in the league who you hate more only to see Hassle and mcnabb still on the board 3 rounds later. Meanwhile you took Ray Rice who isn't even guaranteed every snap and ochocinco, which would have been a great fucking pick if it was the year 2006. and of course Frank Gore was the first round pick just because it looked sexy at the time. Even though last year you did the same exact fucking thing and he did everything but produce quality fantasy points. All this goes through head and then you finally realize that One Tree Hill returns tomorrow night without Lucas Scott. I got a funny little feeling that this isn't going to my year. I should've listened to Ron Packard when he told me to keep my love locked down back in 2007.

Not a Dry Eye In The House

Guys Steal Cop Car At Party

FARMINGTON, N.M. -- A 21-year-old man faces charges after he allegedly stole a New Mexico sheriff's patrol car, later telling investigators he "thought it would be fun." The San Juan County Sheriff's Office said Matthew Anderson was charged with a fourth-degree felony of unlawful taking of a motor vehicle and misdemeanor resisting or obstructing a police officer. The incident happened Monday when two deputies were investigating a disturbance at a party and left the cruiser's engine running.

Isn't this the ultimate goal? Besides saving a kitten in a tree and having a beer with the likes of Sean Avery or Springsteen . You can ask any group of guys and the one dream that keeps them coming back for more partying is the slim chance that maybe they'll get the chance to steal a cop car and go on a booze cruise. And I don't know where it comes from. Chalk it up to seeing it in movies like Varsity Blues when we were most influenced as a young gun maybe. At the end of the day it's just sending a giant ''fuck you" to anything seen as authority. That's what they used to call sticking it to the man in my day. Just something for my bomb squad to think about for our next adventure.

I Think J-Breezy Googled Himself

Homie doesn't want to post facebook status' anymore? Whatever. At least he's not ogling himself, right? The kid made it on the blog several times. If he can make it here, he can make it anywhere as far as I'm concerned. And I hope he knows I mean no harm by it. There's just this little voice inside my head that says if this hombre finds himself a gun, I know who the first guy he crosses off his list will be. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you find something you love, you can't let it get away. You gotta fight like hell until you find peace somewhere. Keep doing your thing playa.


Google Jordon Brault and tell me the first blog that comes up. We're on top of the world now baby.

If that doesn't give you goosebumps then I don't know what will.

Team Gorgeous goes sans bikinis in Playboy

While May, Walsh and others have hogged the beach volleyball spotlight for the past few years, the duo of Michelle More and Suzanne Stonebarger has earned fans with not only their play but stunning looks. The athletic hotties will definitely earn many more fans with their current pictorial in Playboy.
Check it out here.

I Really Hate Bitches.

Tila Tequila, the reality TV star who accused Shawne Merriman of domestic violence last weekend, said via her Twitter feed that she will meet with the San Diego County district attorney's office on Friday. Apparently, that is news to the district attorney. Paul Levikow, communications director for the San Diego County DA's office, told ESPN on Thursday afternoon that there is no meeting scheduled with Tequila.

It's common knowledge that you can't trust a dirty slut/tramp/whore/jump-off/filthy snatch/hooker/hussy/floozy(my new favorite word), wench, jezebel?, dandonahue, PAINTED WOMAN(don't say that to a black chick). I wanna believe that Merriman choked this broad. I really do. There isn't another player that I'd love to see getting rawdogged in prison more than him. But facts are facts. Her name is Tequila and her lips are always yappin. Oh, and she talks a lot too. Fuck you, you're too sensitive.

Not So Happy Birthday?

Don't smile too wide, kids. Gotta hand it to the guy though. Stadium lights might go off but he's always got his game face on.

What Is That Thing?

Nice hair, Zac Efron. I'm not even gonna bag on this kid for the little talent that he has because that could last for days and I don't really have the time or dedication for those antics anymore. You might say I'm growing up. But how old is this kid? 12? 13? and Usher is gonna let him crash at his crib while he's out of town? I don't think he told you to whip out your iPhone and plan an ice cream social you little shit. He said hold the house down. Now you got all these little skanks riding over on their bicycles because they're not old enough to ride in the passenger seat. And what about the 3 dudes on skateboards? They gotta be at least over 23. Don't get me wrong, if I get a text from my 7th grade neighbor that says party at Jim Calhoun's pad then I'm there with 8 friends, a bottle of Jack Daniels and a shotgun. You wont see me showing up with silly string and confetti. I'm just trying to figure out what happened at the end of this video because it appears that he can't even bag a broad at his own party. She gave him the classic look at the watch and bail. Nice job, bro. You can't tell a chick you love her on the first date. Not unless you're MattyK and we all know how that shit always turns out.


P.S. You might want to turn on the xbox controller before you start yelling about draining 3's, you needle dick faggot.

Robber Asks Victim Out On a Date.

COLUMBUS, Ohio -- Ohio police said a suspect in a robbery was arrested when he returned to the home about two hours later to ask the victim out on a date. Police said 20-year-old Stephfon Bennett of Columbus was among three men who robbed a couple late Sunday. Columbus police Sgt. Sean Laird said the woman recognized Bennett as one of the robbers when he returned to ask her out. She had a relative call 911. Police said Bennett was arrested in front of the home. He was arraigned Tuesday on a charge of aggravated robbery and was being held in the Franklin County jail on $100,000 bail.

They've been saying I'm bitter and that heartbreak has left me cold and maybe they're right. After all, I'm just an old beaten down piece of meat these days. But let this story be a lesson to you all. You can be a robber, have all the fine stolen jewelry in the world but until a man finds that woman to make his life complete then he really has nothing worthy to write home about. I say let's forget about this man's crimes. He clearly knows he made a mistake and he just wanted a little lady to take home, create a family and raise his son to correct all of his past errors.

Hey Miley Cyrus, Get a Load Of Powers(that sounds so right).

Obviously my summer of '69 parody was a big hit so I got another request this morning. Here goes nothin'...

He hopped out the car at ESF with a dream and a cardigan
welcome to the land of unprotected sex, is he gonna fit in?
Jumped in the cab, here he is for the first time
looked to his right, saw the Jim Boeheim sign
This is all so crazy, everybody kinda smells like anus
His tummy was turnin and he's feelin kinda morning sick
too many hot wings and he's bloated
but then the asian man turned on the radio and the jonas bro song was on, and the jonas bros song was and the jonas bros was on!
So he put his hands up, they were playing his song, the ass butterfly tattoo seemed to make him fly away. Nodding his head like yeah, moving deb powers' hips like yeah.
Got his hands up, they're playing his song, I think he might be gay. Yeaahhhh, There's a party in SU's back bay.

Got to the dome in his taxi cab, everyone was lookin at him now
Like, "who's that chick that's rockin kicks? he might be from out of town."
So hard with the rza not around him, this is definetly not a burlington party
Cause all he saw were stilletos, I guess he never got the memo.
but then PA turned on his favorite tune and the Hall and Oates song was on.
So he put his hands up, they're playing his song, the butterflies fly away.
Moving his dong like yeahh, shaking his romp like yeahhhhh
Yeaahhhhh, it's a party in the city of gay.

Jon Hates Kate Times 8

The war between Jon and Kate Gosselin hit a peak on the morning talk shows today -- with Jon announcing on national TV that the mother of his 8 children is "someone I despise."Jon was on "GMA" where he kept talkin' trash about his ex -- and even accused her of taking his wedding ring.

You hate to see this. I mean I understand why he would hate this chick but any respect I ever had for him was thrown out the window when he started wearing Ed Hardy shirts. I just wish these two star-crossed lovers could work things out for the kids and whatever they are doing now is just the opposite. What I would say? I'd tell kate that just knowing she's out there thinking about me, caring about me, makes me feel safe so all my fears and yesterdays wash away and all that hope remains in the promise of her embrace. Then I'd tell her that I thank God for every mistake I've made because each one led me down the path that brought me to her. And when we finally come together, I want her to hold me. Hold me all night, stroke my head and tell me that I'm a man and show me that she's a woman until there was only now. You and I and now. That was Pablo Neruda. I don't expect you all to me as well read as me.

Temper, Temper Shawny Boy

Shawne Merriman of the San Diego Chargers was taken into custody by the San Diego County Sheriff's Department after an alleged altercation with Tila Tequila. San Diego Sheriff's deputies responded to a call this morning at 3:45 AM. Tila claims she was "choked and physically restrained" by Merriman after she tried to leave his residence.

I don't like to beat around the bush so let's call it what it is. Wealthy black men beating up girls. Boom. It's out there and now we can move on. You can be a little vagina and call it racism but the facts are there for everyone to see. You don't see angry linebackers like Brian Urlacher snuffing a slut just because she doesn't want to give it up. Now with that being said, Tila must have done something wrong. If she commented on his mother or tested his manhood then I can see the gloves come off. But I'm willing to completely ignore the fact that she's a cheap whore and therefore has a many rights as a 1600's peasant. I absolutely hate Shawne Merriman and I couldn't have been more happier when I heard this story. I think the ideal situation here would be that Merriman goes to prison for life and Tila Tequila just dies. Or something.

Man Launches Cannon At Neighbor

UNIONTOWN, Pa. -- A Pennsylvania history buff who recreates firearms from old wars accidentally fired a 2-pound cannonball through the wall of his neighbor's home. William Maser, 54, fired a cannonball Wednesday evening outside his home in Georges Township that ricocheted and hit a house 400 yards away. The cannonball, about two inches in diameter, smashed through a window and a wall before landing in a closet. Authorities said nobody was hurt. State police charged Maser with reckless endangerment, criminal mischief and disorderly conduct.No one answered the phone Friday at Maser's home. He told WPXI-TV recreating 19th century cannons is a longtime hobby. He said he is sorry and he will stop shooting them on his property, about 35 miles southeast of Pittsburgh.

What did the cannonball ricochet off of? It's gotta be something similar to General Macarthur's ship right? Which brings me to another point. I highly recommend reading up on Douglas Macarthur. The guy was the definition of an OG. I don't think America will ever see the likes of him ever again. Anyway. I digress. If I'm gonna be firing a cannon, I'm making sure that shit is going to bring the rain and the fire. I'm not taking chances on something that can bounce off of a maple tree like a tennis ball in a backyard homerun derby. I play for keeps. And contrary to popular belief, I'm not going to jump all over this guy and call him a dumb fuck because I've been there. Carriage drive used to be home to the annual apple launch where we'd load up a water balloon launch and crush whatever was in our way. Or maybe the time when we'd drive golf balls into the woods and wait for a verification that we hit a house. What I'm saying is when you're dreaming with a broken heart you'll do whatever you feel is necessary to cope. God bless ya.

Oops, Pow, Surprise!

Can you really blame the guy? It's called bringing the noise, you bitches. You're not gonna kick my ass in a game and then try to humiliate me in front of the masses and live to tell about it. And everyone is calling this a "sucker punch." Whatever. Someone needed to wipe that smirk off this dudes face and maybe landing that haymaker was the only way to do it.

Senator Curt Schilling?

A day after writing on his blog that he has "some interest" in running for the seat held for nearly 50 years by Democratic Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, Curt Schilling did not back off -- and sounded even more determined in considering the opportunity. The one thing Schilling would not be fond of is the scrutiny that would come with a potential run. He said he would have to make a decision "in relatively short order" but gave no specific deadline. "[Running] would be fun. The whole spotlight media crap, not so much," the former major league pitcher, who helped the Boston Red Sox win the World Series in 2004 and 2007, told Boston radio station WEEI on Thursday. "But [a run] would be a lot of fun because pretty much anybody that you're fighting against in office right now doesn't really have much of a leg to stand on right now. "There's nobody you can go up against that you couldn't probably drag out a laundry list of stuff and say, 'Listen, this person's already proven that they're status quo, that they're business as usual, and we need anything but in every way shape and form moving forward."

You won't find a much bigger Schilling fan than this guy. I love everything he's done for the game and especially what did for the Sox. But that's baseball. Off the field, I hate the guy. Let's just say I wouldn't wanna go fishing with the man just because all he does is talk. I have faith he'd be able to bullshit his way through politics but there is no way he doesn't throw down his own stats into his campaign run. He just doesn't seem like a fun guy to hang out with. I might come back from class and say, "hey I got a 88 on my test" only to have Curt slap me with a line about how he used to smoke batters with his 88 mph splitter. No one likes that kind of guy.

Remember When Me and The Boys Went To The Cape?

Little known fact that we were actually shooting our debut music video.

The Summer Of 2009 (singing to the tune of summer of '69)

We had our first real keggar
busch light was tasting might fine
Got played until my fingers bled
was the summer of '09

Me and some guys from school
played rockband and we tried real hard
dougie left, nesty got married (smitty's line)
Me and smitty are gonna get real far

But when I look back now that summer seemed to last forever
and if I had to choice, yeah I might not wanna always be there
Those were the drunkest days of my life

Aint no use in complainin' when you got a job to do
spent my days down with schur landscaping
and thats when I met a jew, yeah!
Standing in the roadway inn, mike patel said he couldn't wait forever
oohh when he told us to be quiet, I knew that it was now or never
those were the best days of my life

Man we were killin time, we were young and restless
titties so small you might think them bitches was breastless
huh?

and now the times are changin'
look at everything thats come and gone
sometimes we play rockband, think about MJ and what went wrong
standing on berman's porch, scans was missing for what seemed like forever
oohhh then his sister(candace, god bless her) held my hand and I knew she wanted to get the lever. Those were the best days of my life

Tom Brady Is 8th Best Looking QB. Huh?

Tom Brady has work to do. According to the Wall Street Journal, the Patriots quarterback is only the eighth-handsomest signal-caller in the NFL, bested by the likes of…Kerry Collins? Taking the top spot was Boston College product Matt Ryan of the Atlanta Falcons. Brett Favre, Aaron Rodgers, another BC product in Matt Hasselbeck, Shaun Hill, and Ben Roethlisberger all finished ahead of Brady in the scientific research.

Cue all the talk that I'm gay and blah, blah, blah. This one just hits too close to home. That's my Quarterback. I'm not saying Tom Bradry is the hottest player in the league. I'm saying #12 is the greatest specimen ever created by the higher forces. He's also the best football player in the league. So he has that going for him. Which is nice. But how the fuck does Matt Ryan or even a bald Matt Hasslebeck get rated above him? This thing must be rigged right? I haven't seen a better inside job done than when the class of 2008 voted Matt Kalmin as the class hottie or whatever and guys like me and Kevin Sleich just get completely left of the nominee list. And for those that don't believe just try and remember 3 of the 4 chicas who were in charge of counting up those votes and then think of the connection it has with me. Yup. Uh-huh. Not my fault you sucked at not being a whore. So the only thing I can think of is that Tom Terrific must have wronged these science fucks in some way back in college.

ahjudifhfiuhs FUCK RICKY RUBIO

BARCELONA, Spain -- Ricky Rubio wants to keep playing basketball in Spain, saying a move to the Minnesota Timberwolves would be too risky and complicate his life. The 19-year-old point guard was sent from DKV Joventut to Barcelona on Tuesday after the Catalan club paid Rubio's $5 million buyout clause

.Timberwolves president David Kahn believes that his team will own the rights to a much more mature and seasoned basketball player when it is time for Ricky Rubio to come to the NBA in 2011. Rubio, the Timberwolves' fifth overall pick in this year's draft, agreed to a six-year deal that included a buyout clause that allows him to leave for the NBA after two years."Going to Minnesota would have just complicated my life a lot. It was a risk and I didn't see it so clearly," Rubio said. "My priority was the NBA and it was impossible for the Minnesota Timberwolves to pay my buyout clause, so I wanted to stay home."Timberwolves president David Kahn traveled to Spain three times to try to work out a deal and appeared to have secured Rubio's passage to Minnesota less than 48 hours before the player changed his mind."When the season ended, I entered the draft with the intention of going to the NBA," Rubio said Wednesday. "But some things happened that kept me from being ahead of the rest and I ended up No. 5, which I was happy with, but it didn't allow me the chance to go to the NBA. I tried, but in the end it wasn't to be."

Yeah that makes sense. I get it. I'm 19 too. I wouldn't want to leave spain for millions of dollars, become the face of a franchise, bone any chick I wanted and be financially settled for the rest of my life. Might even buy myself a new crib and let all my friends live in it while I get to play the game I love every day and be fortunate enough to call it my career. Become a PYT machine. Who would want that? I think what gets lost in all the bullshit that this Rubio character spits is the bottom line is that he is just one giant pussy. I guarantee that he is fucking terrified to try and match wits with the likes of Chris Paul or even Rondo. It just doesn't make sense. Unless Spain has some thriving professional league over there that I don't know about, I think it's safe to say Ricky Rubio was too afraid to take a NBA physical because we would ultimately find out that he has a heavy flow and a wide set vagina.