Hilary Duff is on Vacation in a Bikini

Hilary Duff and her husband, NHL player Mike Comrie, were in Capri, Italy this weekend vacationing. I'm pretty sure these are the first ever bikini pictures of Hilary Duff that have made it online. Well, the first pictures of her that show-off her awesome fun bags. And these pictures just made my Monday even better because I've had a crush on her since the "Lizzie McGuire" days and looking at this picture was just starting to get creepy so it's about time I got some new material.

NHL Referee Appears Out of Nowhere

Every so often a video gets posted on the intertubes that takes it by storm. This is one of those videos. The video is from a 2009 NHL playoffs game but didn't get posted until yesterday. It already has over 60,000 views. Shit is hotter than Hansel. The video is from a game between the Chicago Blackhawks and Detroit Red Wings and a referee just appears out of nowhere. Watch this 50 times and try to tell me where this ref comes from.

I think I'm on my 473rd viewing of this video and I still have no fucking clue where the ref came from. Some of my theories:

1. He used a Super Mario warp pipe
2. DeLorean
3. Used some Harry Potter "Floo Powder"
4. Hot Tub Time Machine
5. It's the pleats. It's actually an optical illusion. It's the pattern on the pants.

Daniel Sedin Wins Broken Trophy

The headline of this article should read, "Daniel Sedin Wins Broken Trophy, Immediately Flops, Dives and Chokes in Finals". The only difference between Daniel and Henrik Sedin in this case is that Daniel won a broken trophy. They both flopped, dove and choked in the Stanley Cup Finals. In 7 games Daniel had a whopping 1 goal and 3 assists and Henrik had an outstanding 1 goal and 0 assists. In the past 2 seasons Henrik and Daniel averaged over a point per game so.

Even after this bed shitting of epic proportions, Daniel Sedin knew he would pick up some awards because they were regular season awards and he's the Lebron of the NHL. He won the Ted Lindsay Award which is "awarded annually to the National Hockey League's most outstanding player in the regular season as judged by the members of the NHL Players Association."

When posing with the Ted Lindsay Award, Daniel Sedin was seen in multiple photographs covering up the stick. What a clever little ginger! The only reasonable explanation for all of this is to blame it on the hooligans from Vancouver.

Alex Burrows Doesn't Like Getting Made Fun Of

The NHL Awards just started and host Jay Mohr made fun of Alex Burrows for biting Patrice Bergeron in Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals and when the camera panned to him he wasn't too happy about it. That guy behind him definitely isn't happy about it either but I imagine the only things that guy gets happy about are colonoscopies and a new toupee arriving from Amazon Prime. Also, why is Alex Burrows even there?

"If we learned one thing this year, we learned what it takes to be champions. We learned what it takes to come back from a 2-0 deficit. And we learned that Alex Burrows is a very hungry man. And the Boston Bruins are apparently delicious."

Classic Vancouver here. When everything doesn't go your way you whine and pout and then riot. I'm actually just assuming this is Burrows because the camera went straight to him after the joke and I have no idea what he looks like. Wait a second, I'll just go watch the biting video below to see what he looks like. All Canadiens look the same so I'll just say it: yup, that's definitely him.

Oh hell yes, Robin Scherbatsky is there presenting an award! Canadians! Classic!


UPDATE: Thanks to "anonymous", who I can only assume is Shea Weber or Shea Weber's mother, we have found out that it was Shea Weber who was shown not-so-happy during the awards. Phew! Now I can sleep soundly with that cleared up.

Boston Bruins Spent $100,000 On Bottle of Champagne

The Boston Bruins won the Stanley Cup on Wednesday and on Saturday went to SHRINE at MGM Grand at Foxwoods. They managed to ring up a $156,679.74 bar tab which included $24,869.80 in gratuity and a $100,000 bottle of champagne. SixteenWins.com broke down the entire receipt in an illustrated guide that rivals the works of van Gogh and Warhol. As you can see in the photo below, it is no ordinary bottle of champagne. That thing is bigger than Justin Bieber and Keenan Cahill combined.

Vancouver Riot Nut-Shot

Alright, this video might be better than the last one and at the rate we are going with coverage from these riots I wouldn't be surprised to see 10 more top it before this is over. This video is pure perfection: a) there's nothing better than seeing someone else take a nut-shot b) it's from a flash bang c) it's in slow-mo.

Guy Falls Into A Car Fire During Vancouver Riots

Could this be the best video/gif combo of all-time? Rhetorical!

Vancouver ROCKS

People are just fucking shit up in Canada right now. Living the life. I don't understand why more people don't act like this when their teams lose. This is how important sports are, people are required to ruin cities when they don't win championships. Maybe that'll teach those bastards not to lose again.

Anyway here's a great link of live coverage of the rioting. I haven't been able to stop watching.

http://watch.ctv.ca/news/clip483900#clip483900

Ridiculous Riots After Game 7 Loss in Vancouver

"Riots" is actually an understatement. This is more like "There's nothing else to do in Vancouver besides hockey and now that we lost the most important game in our franchise's history let's burn down and destroy the entire city". It's good to see that Vancouver is handling the loss really well though. Maybe Luongo will just burn down with the rest of the city instead of someone finding him from his shower rod in the morning. Twitter is being flooded with pictures and videos of all the riots and acts of stupidity going on in Vancouver right now so I will continue to update this post as they come in. Enjoy.

P.S. I started this post with my personal favorite of all the pictures I've seen so far. "Look 'ma, I'm in front of the FIREEEEEE!"

Vancouver Canucks Hockey, Everybody!

5:33 into the 3rd period, with the Canucks down 3-0 and feeling very very frustrated, Jaanrik Hansen delivered this Matt Cooke-esque cheap shot that is completely unnecessary and just plain pussy:

Canadien hockey, everybody! Enjoy the off-season Sedins! But remember, stay out of the sun.

This is Why Canada Sucks

C'mon bro, that shit is upside down. If you're gonna belt out the national anthem and shake this towel on national television at least try not to like the idiot we know you are. We all get that you're Canadian but this is bad even for you. This is the Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals! This isn't adult summer beer league. Maybe you're just symbolizing how we might find Roberto Lebrongo (best nickname of all-time?) tomorrow morning if the Canucks lose this game - hanging upside down dying a slow death from blood rushing to his head.

Roberto Luongo Sucks

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA! The measure of how good you are in the playoffs is how good you play on the road. Or if you can back up your trash talk. And Roberto Luongo has done neither. In 3 games in Boston, Luongo has given up 15 goals. Let's not even forget that those 15 goals were in only 112 minutes which is just over 5.5 periods of play. At home in the Stanley Cup Finals Vancouver has won 3 games by a combined total of 3 goals. In Boston, the Bruins have won 3 games by a combined total of 14 goals.

I will end this with Luongo's trash talk after Game 5 that he couldn't back up.

"It's not hard (to stop) if you're playing in the paint. It's an easy save for me, but if you're wandering out, that's going to happen."

Washington Capitals GM Wants Bruce Boudreau Back

Washington Capitals general manager George McPhee released a statement today about how he expects head coach Bruce Boudreau back for the 2011-2012 season. I'm not ready to say Brucey will definitely be back yet because one day after your season ends this is what you have to say as general manager. I still expect Boudreau to be canned but this interview and the quotes got me so frustrated that I had to post it:

According to Washington Capitals General Manager George McPhee, he expects Bruce Boudreau to return as the team's coach next season.

"I expect him to be back, yeah," McPhee told reporters on Thursday. "He's a good coach."

Despite finishing atop the Eastern Conference, the Capitals were swept from the playoffs by the Tampa Bay Lightning, falling 5-3 in Game 4 on Wednesday.

The team has advanced to the playoffs each of Boudreau's four seasons, but has yet to get past the second round. The Caps are 17-20 in the playoffs under Boudreau.

However, that record doesn't faze McPhee.

"Someone said he's not a good playoff coach," McPhee said. "There's no difference between a playoff coach and regular-season coach. Either you're a good coach or you're not. He's a good coach."

The players also seem to want Boudreau to stay.

"This locker room is unbelievable," Capitals captain Alex Ovechkin said following Game 4. "Everybody supports everybody. I hope this same team is going to be here next year."

There are so many things wrong with this article/press conference/whatever you want to call it but I'll try to keep it brief.

1 - "Either you're a good coach or you're not. He's a good coach." The Capitals don't need a good coach, they need a great coach. Moving on.

2 - "The players also seem to want Boudreau to stay." Do you know why the players love Bruce Boudreau so much? Because he has no rules. Because he doesn't make them go to practice. Because he isn't a hard-ass. Because he tries so hard to get along with all of them and be their friend. Because there's no consequences when you don't play hard. Because you know you can slack off and there will be no consequences. If you gave me the option of living in a college dorm with a midnight curfew or one with a 3 A.M. curfew even though the midnight one would probably benefit me down the road, I'd obviously pick the latter.

Two points is all I needed on this one.

Commercial Tribute To Soon-To-Be-Fired Washington Capitals Coach Bruce Boudreau

The top-seed Washington Capitals were just swept in the second round of the NHL playoffs by the fifth seed Tampa Bay Lightning. Bruce Boudreau became the head coach of the Capitals on November 22, 2007. Since then he has led the team to a 189-79-39 regular season record, with seasons of 94, 108, 121 and 107 points. In those four post-seasons the Capitals have lost in the first, second, first and now again second round. Regular seasons results are nice but it's all about the playoffs. There was talk Bruce Boudreau might be fired after last season's meltdown (they were the 1 seed, up 3-1 against the 8 seed Canadiens in the first round and lost) but he wasn't. Now, after this latest playoff failure, Bruce Boudreau's tenure as head coach of the Washington Capitals will finally come to an end. In honor of Bruce being fired in the near future, here is a video tribute of his best commercials that he did while with the Washington Capitals. First, let me say this: Bruce Boudreau completely wasted his opportunity in Wasington D.C. and these commercials just further prove what a bumbling idiot that he is. "Fortunately we're passionate about just one thing"? Yeah, I get it Mercedes-Benz of Alexandria, Bruce Boudreau is embarrassing.

And now I will leave you with this - Bruce Boudreau, in "Slapshot", wearing #7 in green.

NHL Playoff Predictions - Conference Semifinals Edition

The 2nd round of the NHL playoffs started yesterday with the Vancouver Canucks beating the Nashville Predators 1-0. Since I went 7 for 8 in my first round predictions I'll put on my Miss Cleo hat again and give you my round 2 predictions. I'll also copy the analysis I did before round 1 for the teams that are still alive.

East:

1. Washington Capitals: The Capitals haven't had much playoff success lately and have never won a Stanley Cup. In 2008 they were a 3 seed and trailed the 6 seed Flyers 3 games to 1 but forced a game 7 which they lost in OT. In 2009 they were a 2 seed and trailed the 7 seed Flyers 3 games to 1 but ended up winning 3 straight to win the series. Last year they had the top seed and led the Canadiens 3 games to 1 but shit the bed and lost 3 straight and the series. Until this team actually goes on a deep postseason run I'm staying away.

2. Philadelphia Flyers: This team is limping into the playoffs, with a 3-4-3 record in their last 10. I'm not a big believer in this Flyers team but they were 1st in the East for most of the season. They made the finals last year when no one expected them to get out of the first round so I'm not one to bet against them. They might even get Chris Pronger back sometime in Round 1. That's a big "might". As big as Kim Kardashian's ass. Too easy.

3. Boston Bruins: They were the most "unexciting team that won a lot of games in the regular season". If Tim Thomas can get hot he can carry this team. They have a shut-down defense which wins in the playoffs. Some one is going to have to step up and score goals for this team or it will be a short lived playoffs for them.

5. Tampa Bay Lightning: They are the NHL's version of the Oklahoma City Thunder. They have a young stud, people don't expect them to win and they just might surprise people. The Lightning have a mix of ridiculous young talent and veterans who have won in the playoffs before. That can be dangerous. The only question is their goaltending. Dwayne Roloson has been deep in the playoffs before but he is 41-years-old.

West:

1. Vancouver Canucks: They were the best team in the regular season. They have the Sedin brothers. They have an awesome goalie in Roberto Luongo. What else do you want me to say? How about, they never perform in the clutch in the playoffs. How about, one of their best Centers, Manny Malholtra, got hurt on March 17. How about, they have never won a Stanley Cup. How about I just say this - this team is the best team in the NHL.

2. San Jose Sharks: This team always seems to choke in the playoffs but they are loaded with talent. Let's see if that can finally pay off.

3. Detroit Red Wings: The Red Wings have more playoff experience than Jenna Jameson does at making pornos. Never bet against that. Who bets on pornos anyways?

5. Nashville Predators: They traded for Carrie Underwood's husband, Mike Fisher, on February 10. She just so happens to live in Nashville. I like this team. It plays playoff hockey, scoring goals when they need to but also playing great defense. They also ended the regular season on a 7-2-1 run. They've lost in the first round 5 straight times so they have to win sometime, right? Right?

2nd Round:

1 Washington Capitals vs. 5 Tampa Bay Lightning (Lightning in 7)

2 Philadelphia Flyers vs. 3 Boston Bruins (Bruins in 6)

1 Vancouver Canucks vs. 5 Nashville Predators (Canucks in 5)

2 San Jose Sharks vs. 3 Detroit Red Wings (Sharks in 7)

Conference Finals:

3 Boston Bruins vs. 5 Tampa Bay Lightning (Bruins in 5)

1 Vancouver Canucks vs. San Jose Sharks (Canucks in 6)

Stanley Cup Finals:

1 Vancouver Canucks vs. 3 Boston Bruins (Canucks in 6)

Some notes:

The Caps might have beaten the Rangers 4-1 but I still don't trust them winning in the playoffs until they go on a deep run. The Flyers didn't impress me in round 1. The Bruins lost the first 2 games on the road but then won 4 of 5 to take the series. Luongo looked lost until game 7 but redeemed himself and I'm sticking with him and the Canucks even though the Predators look like a tough out. The Sharks vs. Red Wings series might be the best one of this round and I'll be watching that one whenever I can.

Here is your conference semifinals TV schedule, courtesy of NHL.com and me for taking all of these screen-shots and formatting them for you. Yes, you're welcome:

Boston Bruins vs. Montreal Canadiens Game 7 Ending

Two of the most storied franchises in hockey met in a game 7 tonight. Of course it went to OT. Well first, with 1:57 remaining and down by 1, P.K. Subban scored this power play goal to tie it.

This game and game 6 were two of the worst officiated games I have seen so far in the playoffs. The Bruins were constantly getting trolled by the refs. With 2:37 left in the 3rd the refs made a ticky-tacky call (why do I keep using/hearing that this playoffs) that led to the Canadiens power play and eventual goal. Well 5:43 into OT this happened:

Sorry, Canada. You haven't won a Stanley Cup since 1993 and your only team left this year went 7 games plus OT vs. an 8 seed but don't worry, the Phoenix Coyotes will probably move to Winnipeg next year so....Well, yeah the Coyotes suck. The first round of the playoffs is finally in the books and the 2nd round schedule is set. I will be posting the schedule, match-up previews and predictions later tonight so you probably want to stay up to read those because I correctly predicted 7 of 8 series in the first round. Call me Mr. Cleo.

Washington Capitals History Will Be Made Video

Washington Capitals coach Bruce Boudreau talked about how Madison Square Garden is shitty and not that loud on the radio on Monday. He said:

“Well, the one thing, its reputation is far better than the actual building,” the coach said. “I mean, it’s nothing. The locker rooms are horrible. The benches are horrible. There’s no room for anything. But the reputation of being in Madison Square Garden is what makes it famous. Also, our building’s a lot louder, too. So I mean, they can say what they want, but it’s not that loud in there.”

You may have noticed that the Caps quickly went down 3-0 to the Rangers in the 2nd period on Wednesday and the crowd started a "Can you hear us" chant but in the 3rd period the Capitals pulled off the greatest comeback since Lazarus to tie it and send it into OT. What follows is my favorite YouTube video of all-time. Of...All...Time!

Anaheim Ducks Forward Bobby Ryan Scores Ridiculous Goal

Bobby Ryan, left winger on the Anaheim Ducks, returned from a 2 game suspension tonight and scored an absolutely ridiculous goal. He should never have been suspended but I'll deal with that at the bottom of this post. Let me set the scenario for this goal. He plays for the Anaheim Duck and they were playing the Nashville Predators. The series was tied 2-2 and the game was tied 1-1 30 seconds into the 3rd period. That's when Bobby Ryan pulled off this sick nasty move.

I haven't seen a move that awesome since I was in-shape in high school doing that. Alright but about that ridiculous suspension he received. A week ago Bobby Ryan was suspended for this "kicking incident". First of all this isn't "kicking", it's more of a "pushing your foot onto the top of his skate where there is a ton of padding" motion. Kicking is dangerous, this isn't. If you have ever played hockey you know this is a harmless play. The recent plays by Chris Kunitz and Steve Downie only got 1 game suspensions so the fact that this got a 2 game suspension is absolutely ridiculous.

Taylor Swift Nashville Predators Commercial

Am I the only one rooting for the Predators to keep winning so that we have the opportunity to see some more Taylor Swift?

Playoff Beards!

Unfortunately I don't know half as much about hokey as Billy Blog does, hell I don't even know how to spell it! (See back I misspelled it intentional! Clever I know.) My favorite part about the playoffs is growing my super awesome playoff beard and making fun of Sidney Crosby for growing pubes on his face and not a real beard like me. So instead of giving expert analysis on hockey like Billy Blog, I'm going to give my picks and post a super hot picture of Kate Beckinsale. Plus I like NBA way more anyway so I'll give an in-depth post of those match-ups later tonight once the playoff positions are locked.



Fuck she's hot.

1st Round:
Capitals over Rangers
Flyers over Sabers
Canadiens over Bruins
Lightening over Penguins

Canucks over Blackhawks
Sharks over Kings
Red Wings over Coyotes
Ducks over Predators

2nd Round
Caps over Canadiens
Lightening over Flyers

Canucks over Ducks
Red Wings over Sharks

Conference Finals
Caps over Flyers

Red Wings over Canucks

Stanley Cup Final
Red Wings over Caps

Basically I picked the Wings cause a good friend of mine is a Wings fan and he's always super grumpy when they lose. Plus I really like that Chrysler Detroit commercial. Anyways, NBA playoffs will be better.