Kim Kardashian Is Insecure on Cover of Self Magazine

If we needed another example as to why girls are awesome this is it. Kim Kardashian is on the cover of Self magazine's April issue and started yapping about how she feels fat and ugly.

"Of course I struggle with insecure moments. I wish I didn't, but I love to eat, especially black dick sweets. And I’ll say it. I think my thighs are jiggly and I have cellulite. Now let’s move on!"

In honor of March Madness (and Kim's boyfriend Kris Humphries - wait, that's not Kris Humphries, this is. Side note - is it at all weird that he has the same name as Kim's mom and they spell it the same wack-job way?) this one is a layup, slam dunk and 3 pointer all-in-one. It serves as a reminder that even the hottest girls are insecure. And insecure girls are easier. William Hung could bang Kim while she is insecure. So the next time you are at the bar and see a dime, don't think you have no shot. Instead, start calling her fat and take it to the bank. Insecurity - making untouchables, touchable.

"Glee" Covers GQ Magazine

Oh mylanta. "Glee's" Lea Michele and Dianna Agron are on the cover of the November issue of GQ magazine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I realize Cory Monteith is also on the cover but I'm pretty sure no one is paying any attention to him. They have the slutty classy look down to a science. After learning that the set of "Glee" is like one big giant orgy and then seeing these pictures it actually inspired me to take singing lessons. Oh, and go back to high school.

When my roommates (no, not my parents) started watching "Glee" last year I hated it at first. I thought it was the second worst show on t.v., after American Idol. After the first season ended I decided to give it a chance and watched all the episodes. I was hooked, but it was the kind of hooked that you only do alone while making sure no one is watching or knows about it. Speaking of which, why am I even saying this? The second season's plot has not been nearly as good as the first but with a rumored Taylor Swift episode in the works things are looking up.

The show has gotten pretty racy awesome lately, complete with lesbian sex scenes and as long as it keeps producing things like this photo shoot I'll keep paying attention to it.

*Click to enlarge*

Andre Ethier Ridiculous Photo Shoot For L.A. Times Magazine

I'm not sure what's worse - the "uggghhhh" inducing title of this article or the actual pictures. "Dre's Anatomy"? Seriously? I'm always a fan of terrible puns but "Dre's Anatomy"? Are you kidding me? Andre Ethier, outfielder for the Los Angeles Dodgers, did a photo shoot for L.A. Times Magazine and looked absolutely ridiculous. You may be thinking, "L.A. Times Magazine...where do I remember that from?". Well 3 months ago Kobe Bryant also did a photo shoot for L.A. Times Magazine looking just as ridiculous. The interview actually wasn't terrible and Ethier seems like a good guy but were the pictures really necessary? In the picture at the top he looks like Fegan Floop from Spy Kids.

Let's see what we have here:

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1. L.L. Bean Catalog Model
2. The 3rd character from Brokeback Mountain
3. Yeah, I was excited about the season premiere of Mad Men last week too but clearly not as excited as Ethier.
4. It was Dean Martin karaoke night. DUH!

Rindsay Rohan

Everyone's least favorite fame whore, Lindsay Lohan, plans to pose nude to promote her handbag line. Normally a sentence with the words "pose" and "nude" gets me excited...butttttt (that could be a large or small butt depending on if she's been hitting up the nose candy recently) does anyone really want to see her naked? I don't need to see a fire crotched, coked out, SCRAM bracelet wearing hooker naked promoting handbags that I will never buy. If you're going to get naked promote something useful like Natty Light. I'd rather see Helen Mirren naked...wait...that just happened?!?!?!?!?!? Alright I lied - my eyes are permanently scarred.


Ah yes, that brings me to the SCRAM bracelet she has to wear 24/7 - the one accessory in Lindsay's otherwise birthday-suit photo shoot. She can't take it off so people are wondering will it be in the pics? Will it be airbrushed out? Well a rep from her handbag company said, "We're thinking of having police on hand so we can remove the ankle bracelet for the pictures". Now I'm beginning to think this is all an evil plan by Lindsay to get the police to remove the bracelet so she can go get shit-faced for an hour. Genius.

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